August 2019

2 min read
Yesterday I saw a friends tweet which read “Everyone falls for more… be it more money, intelligence, looks or whatsoever value touches your core! Strive for more, chase more, be more!” I couldn’t agree any less only because of one reason, it being that it’s just the robotic status quo our society and the world at large expects from us.
In my opinion, I will say that the need to become more has subjected us to not just an overboard of pressure, but honest fears too. For someone like me, I keep acting like I have a beast chasing me about with an axe, and the moment I relent, he strikes me dead, hence why I keep running.
No matter the stage I’m at, I keep wanting more and more and I’m sure it happens to you too. Everyone falls into the temptation of believing that there is a certain peak they ought to reach but why is it that whenever we get there, another target surfaces and then we resume the chase again?
I have observed my environment with the people in it, I have also read historicals and watched on televisions about other environments too, never ever have I met a man who wanted to be less than he already is or is satisfied with how he currently is. No, wait! I have met satisfied men and women, who wouldn’t mind how much they earned but notwithstanding went about their doings, but guess what! they only existed in fictional stories and folklores my grandmother never had the time to tell me…maybe they once existed in our world but trust me they are extinct now. Or have you ever seen an intelligent man who doesn’t work hard for more knowledge? Or a wealthy man who doesn’t work for more money?
The 'Top' Is A Mirage
Eventually, when he gets there, he will only realize that there is, in fact, another ‘Top’ he has to get to.
But frankly, I am losing my self peace in this war for more, O yes! it is a war and an unending one too. No matter how I channel my mind to be content with the knowledge, money, clothes, finesse and all that I have, I keep failing at it.
Could it be that the world order has placed me in a subconscious competition with myself? could it be conscious competition with the people who live in this world with me?
Is there really a top or that’s the way we’ve been trained to view it? I’m asking because every time I hear a man  say that he’s headed for the top, I always wonder which ‘Top’ because eventually when he gets there, he will only realize that there is, in fact, another ‘Top’ he has to get to…and there goes the craze, it keeps moving on and on. The ‘top’ is a Mirage Indeed.
2 min read

If someone does not finish a meal you prepared, does it mean it’s not delicious? Yes or No?

 More than half the time I think ‘yes’. Every woman loves to be showered praises for her culinary skills, it gives her a special sense of joy and respect.

For a man, it’s ego exciting and some special fashion of contentment when they learn how beautiful their culinary skills are.

I have never met anyone who doesn’t wish to be really good in the kitchen. Even those who claim they hate to cook wish they are as good. It is the result of failure and the fear of subsequent fails that made them attain a hatred for cooking; no other reason would have been appropriate.

Delicious? Yes or No?
Truth be told having excellent culinary skills is an attractive quality.

So back to my question; if someone doesn’t finish a meal you prepared, what does it mean? 

Could it be that they couldn’t eat anymore, maybe their stomachs got so full? But if it were as delicious, wouldn’t they try their best to get to the root of the plate… No one resists a delicious meal innit?

O yes!  I have another question or maybe two or three…how exactly do you feel when someone doesn’t finish your meal or worst off you see them cursing under their breath as they eat? For me, the worst is the numb feeling.

You must say something after eating my meal. Directly or stylishly, Good or bad, you must say. How can you eat my meal and become dumb afterwards huh😐? The meal didn’t make you dumb right?

So tell me how you really feel *In drakes voice*😊

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Ever been met with a custodian of false historical? The one who seems to know everything about everyone in a place?
When we are in a new environment, could be a new area, job, school etc. There’s always a talebearer within; the one who poses to know about all and Sundry.
For instance, you got a new job, it’s only normal that you try to know everyone to a reasonable extent. In the process, you will notice that there’s this quietly or overtly notorious someone who seems to be getting pretty close to you😌.
The moment you give them a chance, boom! They begin to tell you about everyone in the workplace. They give you a history of all the staff that was sacked and why. They tell you about the boss, his/her work life and personal life. They tell you who to avoid and who is nice. They paint the flaws of the workplace in a terrible light and you begin to wonder why they are still working there😦.
Be careful! These ones have nothing good to say. They hold only false histories of people. They hate with no reservations and are on a mission to recruit more haters. You will be shocked when you find out the real reason behind their hate for certain individuals in the workplace. It could be that the someone refused to give them free lunch or corrected them once at something they did wrong… Very foolish reasons to hate.
custodian of false historical?
There is one in Every Work Environment
Just like we understand things differently, this is their own myopic understanding of the people. They dish out stories relentlessly until you buy their own understanding. It’s more like a soul-winning technique for them, they will stop at nothing until they get you on their side.
How ridiculous it is Yeah! These custodians of false historical are everywhere. Be careful not to fall into the temptation of hating who they hate, of understanding how they understand…Get to know people for you, meet them and learn about them from your own perspective. I understand gossip can be sweet😂😂, but please shun these ones as it will do you a whole lotta good✌.
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Why exactly are you kind to people? Why do you give even when you have little to spare? Is it because you feel it in your heart to do so or because you think about tomorrow… Perhaps you might be the one in the ‘needing’ shoes yeah?

A lot of people go out of their way to be kind, after several battles in their mind, grumblings and all, they resolve to give notwithstanding. They give because majority gave, not like it was easy for them but because they heard words like “What if it’s you tomorrow… If you don’t give, in your time no one will give to you when you need help”.

I am not saying it is bad to give or lend a helping hand to someone in dire need, but do you feel it in your heart to do so? Are you doing it for the sake of you or for the fear of Karma? Some say ‘Give because it is the right thing to do, not because you feel it’ but I beg to differ. You must feel it in your heart to give, otherwise, it’s hypocrisy.

What goes around doesn't come around
Do you believe in Karma?

I don’t believe in Karma! Karma is only a guilt-tripping mechanism. It registers in our consciousness and takes advantage of our true human nature. The constant thought of Karma will only exploit a man’s true behavior. Let me tell you, no matter how much of a good man or woman you are, if you need help tomorrow the world will not fall at your feet. Some will give, Some will rebel against giving you…that’s life! You are good doesn’t mean good things will forever follow you.

For someone like me, no matter how good or bad I know you are, I still wouldn’t lend a help except I feel it, and mind you, my feelings are not based on the fact that you are good or bad. Giving is an emotion, if I don’t feel it, I won’t give it.  If you have to inculcate giving or be selfish, do it because it’s how you truly feel. If you also desire the need to change behavior, do it for you and not because you want people to be kind in return.

If it’s true that good follows good, why then do we often ask why bad things happen to good people? What goes around doesn’t come around… The world is made of ‘good and bad’, everyone will have a taste.

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When she texted me saying she had just lost her dad, my reaction was although cliche but acceptable I bet.

“Wow! When did this happen… I am so sorry for your loss… How have you been holding up dear? Please accept my condolence “

But was this me? Was it how I wanted to react or how society taught me to? Society taught me this and also taught me not to ask the things I would have wanted to because I might come across as insensitive.

How do you react to the news of death? I bet you are just like me who reacts in a way you are expected to and then you keep asking questions at the back of your mind…questions you would have loved the bereaved to answer for you but it’s very unfortunate you cannot ask.

When someone tells me they lost a loved one, I cannot help but ponder the gravity of fuzziness that must be going on in their heads.

Do they feel their presence even though they are dead? Are they terrified to stay alone knowing that their ghost might appear like in the movies?

Were there any signs of death apart from the sickness that was noticeable? Were there any last words? Should I ask them how they truly feel?  Perhaps it wasn’t a loss for them but a relief? Should I ask them the real reason for their tears? Maybe they are mandated to cry after all!

I hate it when I hear someone say ‘Look at that one, she’s not even crying… She hasn’t cried the whole time’.For goodness sake! Is it now a cry competition? Do you know what’s in the heart?

I haven’t lost anyone so close before, and I hope I don’t come across as insensitive. These are the thoughts that go on in my head. Don’t get me wrong, I sincerely give my condolence, but trust me there’s more to every condolence than meets the eyes.

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The story of Samson in the Bible makes me imagine a whole lot.

What if we are like the biblical Samson?

What if there are certain things we must not do but have already done and now we face several implications? But we think it’s just life!

Sometimes I see little children who haven’t had a hair cut before, they wear this natural dread (Dada). I often ask why the parents decided to leave the hair unkempt, but the response is usually ‘They said we shouldn’t put scissors on the hair?’. This is particularly amongst the Celestial Churches. Before I usually laughed it off saying they wallowed in religion but lately I’ve been giving it a serious second thought.

I discussed this with a friend a few days ago. We reminisced on how innocent our minds were as kids, how we were naturally creative, A+ as kids,  but now adulthood seems to have polluted our talents to some extent. And I asked ‘What if we are like the biblical Samson?’,  maybe we must have done something(s) we shouldn’t have? And also indulged in it subsequently, thus it has reduced our prowess to perform as geniuses that we should be?

What if we are like the biblical Samson
Samson and Delilah

I always say it and I will keep saying, although the world comes with a lot of enjoyment, it doesn’t change the fact that life is spiritual.  I just cannot believe it was only Samson God gave a mandate on what to indulge in and what not to. It could be that some of us are not supposed to ever take alcohol, cut our hair, eat a particular food, leave outside a particular town, etc…

Some of us might be suffering from the repercussions of premarital sex but we don’t know!

Things happen daily that we cannot fathom, it might just be a repercussion for some misdeeds, but we are so blind that we put all the blame on life, saying it has its ups and downs.

We keep saying life is a pot of beans, I disagree. We are only compelled to say that because we live our lives just like everyone else. We are like different products here on earth… And you know products come with individual manuals,  if only we could follow our own manual to the latter, life might just be a jar of honey.

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Dear Mutterers,  how do you all cope? First, my phone is always on ‘silent mode’ and as a matter of fact I hate ring tones, they freak me out and equally annoy me…bottom line, I hate taking calls!

The only time you will find my phone on ‘loud mode’ is if I am expecting a very important call may be from a delivery guy or my alarm. As soon as I am done,  it goes back to the norm.

God help me I forget to put it back on silent and it rings… OMG! first I freak out at the tone, then the second I just have an automatic mood swing that makes me lash out at the caller.

On most occasions, I don’t even answer my mobile, and then someone with three heads decides to give me more than 2 missed calls😤…what makes you think I’m not with my phone the whole time huh😲Am I the only one this happens to?

Image result for hating phone calls
This could have been a text or email!

I believe before you call a person, you should ask yourself ‘is this textable?’ Phone calls, in my opinion, are not meant for telling stories (gisting) but passing concise Information. If you must gist, you can send a text to meet up with the person.

I will choose to text over telephone calls anytime because it gives me the much needed time to think before sending out a reply, unlike phone calls which leave you with intermittent awkward silences all in the name of trying to be in sync with certain conversations.

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There is nothing spectacular about the movie Bird Box. It’s like the everyday kind of confusing horror movies I watch. The title got me confused, it has nothing to do with a lot of scenes that took place. The storyline was about demons manipulating people into committing suicide and I was wondering what connections does it have to do with the Bird Box.
And then Sandra Bullock was seen moving around with a box of three birds in it.
What first came to my mind was that the birds were behind the attack & they weren’t aware of. It actually created suspense that caught my attention but only to find out at the end that the birds were used as directions to their destination.
Image result for bird box movie images
A lot of viewers got confused about the whole scenarios and I’m still yet to understand what demons or who was actually responsible for the suicide.
Is it the unseen demons or humans without blindfolds? We didn’t get to see how the demon came into existence and all of a sudden people who could see demons came along.
I feel the movie is overrated: there is nothing extraordinary about it.
It’s just a replica of the movie ‘silent room‘ where they were made not to talk or make any sound but at the end, they were able to kill the demons attacking them, unlike Bird box that gave confusing scenes.
What made it outstanding were the actors, most especially the kids that gave it a strong back up at the ending part.


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In the movie ‘Bird Box‘, it was obvious that the lead actress (Malorie) had trust issues with people particularly men, I felt it had something to do with her pregnancy. Probably she had an unhealthy relationship with a man who got her pregnant and didn’t want anything to do with the kid. It affected the way she sees people and life in general. It also made her categorize all men as “assholes” this affected her decision making.
Someone she taught was an “asshole”(Douglass) turned out to be right all along and someone she taught was good and kind (Gary) turned out to be an “asshole” all along.
I just love the role of Tom. He showed her that not all men are assholes, he taught her to let her guards down, to embrace and experience all that life has to offer in spite of their predicament,  He showed her that life is not all about the destination or survival but is about the journey. He taught her that she can’t be too careful. And finally, he showed her what true love is.
Image result for bird box movie images
And I think the effect of Tom in her life was revealed in the Scene where one of the kids had to open their blindfolds to direct her. The old Malorie would have picked the girl (which is not her daughter) in a heartbeat knowing the death risk. But she chose not to pick anyone.
Bird Box is just awesome. It takes you through a horrifying but yet captivating experience on how Malorie evolved from a chary and nonchalant personality to this caring and loving mother who would do anything for her kid and even a kid that’s not hers.