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2 min read

We all have the mask we put on which is good as it protects us, helps us blend in amongst peers; the proper way to talk, approach matters and people. It is called “The Mask Of civility”. 

By all definition it is welcomed as we can’t go about insulting and fighting everyone we have disagreements with or acting like animals and touts (no offence to touts) but the meaning of this “mask” in reality is lost on us.

Read: Why Are You Not Crying?

Our definition is “smiling at someone while bashing them behind their backs”, “feeling you are better than someone because their mindset and beliefs are different from yours” or “looking down on an individual earning an earnest living”.

Mask
Do you lay on your bed with regret?

What’s on your mind while retiring to bed every night? Knowing you had to wear the mask all day, how do you feel? When you lay all by yourself in your darkroom, how genuine are your thoughts? I hope you know ‘genuine’ doesn’t mean all positive thoughts? Do you feel cheated knowing the mask constrained you from being you?

Read: Will Tyler Perry’s ‘A Fall From Grace’ Overshoot Acrimony’s Rating?

Wearing the mask is good, but replacing it with a full-blown kiss-ass morality/ ethics amounts to hypocrisy and fakery. Be bold and proud enough to be who you are but do not disrespect the next man’s individuality.

Mask
Sometimes Mask Off

Sometimes to avoid beating yourself up, you don’t have to wait to get to your darkroom before taking off the mask. Mask off. 

 

2 min read

[True Story..embellished a bit]

When in Church, we learn about the amazing qualities of our Almighty Father in Heaven.

“God is wonderful”

“God is powerful”

“God is beautiful”

“God is merciful”

…oh yeah, ‘merciful’, this is our most preferred quality of the creator because let’s face it, as humans, we don’t actually strive that much to do good so we count on the mercies of our heavenly father to wipe our slates clean over and over. This is more evident whenever we kneel down in our closets to pray or speak to the priests in the confessionals.

As you know, priests have ‘the right’ to forgive, except only recently the pontifical secrecy rules for sex abuse cases was scrapped by the current Pope Francis. Asides that, every other word uttered to a priest remains a secret.

Wondering my emphasis on priests? I grew up to see my village Parish under construction, and thirty years later, it was still under construction despite all the funds raised over the years which is usually left in the care of the village principalities (building committees).

Read: Testifiers are Performers

The current priest on arriving the parish acted oblivious to the situation for a while, trying not to meddle into church politics for obvious reasons. Well, that is until he just couldn’t anymore.

He woke up one day to discover that the 100 bags of cement he was personally gifted had been carted away by ‘ghosts’ from the storage only members of the building committee had access to.

He summoned them over the missing bags but they all denied. Going priestly, he asked them to come for confessions but I’m guessing they all said within themselves “Nah priest, we ain’t feeling the holy vibes just yet”. Even after giving a week ultimatum, they probably thought “nothing will happen, God is merciful. We are safe”

priest
“Confess! Confess!” he charged.
Read: ‘Fallen Christians’…They Had No Stand!

A week later, my dear Rev’d father stepped out of his cassock and wore a jean and polo. He went across the road from the parish premises to “Oñû Modo ômadû” (the village shrine, whose priest ironically is dead) and laid a deadly and fast-acting curse on them there.

The bushes have ears. People heard it. They told their neighbours, and their neighbours told the culprits. “Father!!! Father… Father where are you? Father I have sinned, please father forgive me”, one of the culprits came pleading with the priest.

The priest smiled. Prayed for him, and he lived. A week later, the other three died in different mysterious circumstances. 

Now the Question… Why do we fear other deities and take the Almighty for granted?

 

Note: Onu Odo means ‘the masquerade’s abode’

Omadu- is the village, in the town known as EBE.( Ebe is a town in UDI LGA, of Enugu State)

2 min read

So about Jumanji: The Next Level…ermm where do I begin? 

I like to believe most of us already know the cliche storyline of the fantasy adventure. Whereby a group of friends get sucked into a game, gets transformed into entirely different characters than they look in real life and then have to play the game with only three lifelines.

However, the recent release, Jumanji: The Next Level, directed by Jake Kasdan, and co-written by Kasdan, Jeff Pinkner and Scott Rosenberg tells the story of the main character Spencer who fell into a nostalgic depression because he misses the character he became when he got sucked into the game in part one.

Read: Here’s every Reason to Watch ‘Sugar Rush’

Jumanji: The Next Level

Craving to feel the same again, Spencer plays the game again and gets sucked. His friends try to save him only to realise the game was full unbeknownst to them the game had swallowed Spencer’s grandpa and his old-time friend, a character played by Danny Glover. 

Spencer wasn’t lucky this time as he transforms into a feminine character instead, while his grandpa clinched the character he longed for, Dwayne Johnson. His old-time friend transforms into Kevin Hart.

In the course of the game, Dwayne Johnson  finds it difficult to grasp, making them stuck in the video game and also kept getting everyone killed😅

Big clap to Kevin Hart for mimicking Danny Glover perfectly and for all the times he got them into trouble with his beat about the bush sermons.

I was excited to see Rory McCann [The Hound] from Game Of Thrones, you remember him? If you watched the series then you should. Well, unsurprisingly he is the Villain in the Jumanji world.

Jumanji

Read: Charle’s Angels 2; Why the Actors Should Not Be Blamed For its Excellence Drought 

 

Hollop! I think I’m going too far with the spoilers. I will stop here.

Need I say that apart from the new characters and the comic theme , Jumanji: The Next Level lacked originality. It was bland as there was no action to look forward to. There was no jaw-dropping twist or stomach-churning suspense. It felt flat and I found myself wishing I had waited for it to be out online rather than rushing to the cinema to watch it. 

However, amid its shortcomings, Jumanji: The Next Level, focuses on the beauty of genuine friendship, teamwork, forgiveness, rebuilding broken relationships and finding peace.

Overall, I will rate it 6/10.

 

2 min read

Truth be told I was very sceptical about buying the tickets for the movie ‘Sugar Rush, first because it is Nigerian and second…you know the rest.

But check me out now, a former big-time doubting Thomas of Nollywood films turned a fan itching for more of this kind of productions. Need I say that watching Sugar Rush is a decision I dont regret.

Judging by the recent traffic the movie has gathered in short space after its debut on December 25, 2019, I’m guessing you must have seen the trailer. Directed by Kayode Kasum and produced by Jade Osiberu, Sugar Rush is about three sisters and their ailing mother. The trio played by Bimbo Ademoye, Bisola Aiyeola and Adesua Etomi-Wellington have their characteristics a far cry away from each other which makes the movie more interesting. The only thing they have in common is their bloodline.

The movie takes us on a journey of how the sisters come in contact with a large sum of money and end up entangled in a deep heated mess with some Crime Lords and the Economic and Financial Crimes Commission (EFCC).

Mere thinking of the scenes in Sugar Rush while writing this review, I am already laughing. Comedy was well delivered! The Characters acted their roles graciously. Asides the three sisters, characters like BB-Naija’s Tobi Bakre, Banky W, Omoni Oboli, Toke Makinwa, and Mawuli Gavor were well aligned in the movie.

Sugar Rush

READ: Sugar Rush halts Pejorative Remarks About Nollywood

I also commend the graphics and editing that was invested in the movie. Very commendable!

Click here to read other movie Reviews on Muttering Minds 

The end of the movie might be a hard pill to swallow for some die-hard critics because it included a bit of JUJU Magic but overall, It is a good movie.

What did I learn? I can’t even say. I was too busy laughing and trying to get over the habitual display of the girl next to me on the floor being dealt with a burst of uncontrollable laughter.

Hollop! Regardless of Sugar Rush propensity to make you laugh your ass off, it doesn’t mean the movie was all bants, It had serious moments too. I would rate it a 7.5/10

 

 

3 min read

Now about the current, most talked about Nollywood movie that raked N152M in less than two weeks, unbelievable right? Well speaking of none other but Jadesola Osiberu’s ‘Sugar Rush’

Best believe the movie puts an end to pejorative statements like “I don’t really like Nigerian movies”,  “I can’t spend my money to watch a Nigerian movie”, and blah blah blah…

The movie which stars famous actresses like Bimbo Ademoye, Adesua Etomi-Wellington and Bisola Aiyeola who are referred to as the ‘sugar sisters’ is a perfect blend of upgraded film-making nuances and old school preternatural abilities which was very facile and went down smoothly.

Read: Knowing When the welcome Party is Over

Anyone looking for a rib-cracking laugh, an idea on what exactly not to do if they stumbled across a million dollars, or how to catch the eye of a money bag in human form should definitely watch Sugar Rush.

Sugar Rush

The story centres around three struggling young ladies with a sickly mother who stumbles upon a windfall and are happy their troubles are over. But boom! their money trails lead the money hounds right up to their doorstep. Amid the tribulations to secure their lives, they realize that there is no easy way to come by great wealth unless one was born into it.

Personally, I enjoyed every single statement and action by Bisola Aiyeola who played the character Sola Sugar. Her style was very natural. She was as extra as her character needed to be, as open and giving as a hot babe with dreams of living on Banana Island in a home with a pool needed-to-be, bottom line, she was the backbone of fun in the movie!

Click Here For More Movie Reviews on Muttering Minds…

The fusion of culture and modern features was remarkably well done. Nigerian languages and slangs were portrayed nicely. The graphics, photography and cinematography were clean and clear. 

 

The accident and violent scenes appeared very real. It had the viewers grabbing their armrests while screaming “Yay!”. Scenes like when a cast got literally thrown out of a glass window or smashed into a table looked so real as opposed to previous Nollywood productions where its usually evident that some form of trickery or finagling had been performed.

Sugar Rush without dubiety shows how fast and far Nigeria’s movie industry has improved. It also inspires a thirst for more productions like this: Hilarious acts and suspenseful plots mixed into volatile scenes.

Read: Charlie’s Angels 2; Why the actors Should Not Be Blamed for its Excellence Drought

Of course, there’s always room for improvement. There was a particular scene that was a bit confusing. It was supposed to be funny but it didn’t really come across as funny. If you have watched sure you can recall when two of the sugar sisters were surrounded by dead bodies yet they still had a conversation for nearly 2 minutes. It didn’t seem like something average people who aren’t used to seeing dead bodies would do. It was quite unrealistic.

Also, towards the end, staunch critics might claim the storyline kicked off with the typical Nigerian style which revolves around superstitious acts, disappearance, incantations, and all sorts. However, that is the Nigerian style and besides, it didn’t look too fake. 

The entire movie was composed of many pleasurable scenes. It performs a sufficient job at entertaining the viewers. Overall, Sugar Rush (2019) is a good recommendation, I’ll rate it 90%.

Click Here For More Movie Reviews on Muttering Minds…
2 min read

Despite reading a few negative reviews online for Charlie’s Angels 2, I still got the movie ticket alongside some crunchy popcorn to watch it. Was it worth it after all?  

Majority of you must have watched the prequel which was released in 2000. It starred Drew Barrymore (Dylan), Cameron Diaz (Natalie), and Lucy Liu (Alex), all three women commonly referred to as ‘Angels’. They stole our hearts with their stellar performances.

However, the sequel of the American action comedy film written and directed by Elizabeth Banks was set times ahead. The angel’s group led by John Bosley had dilated from three angels to a thriving worldwide organization.

Some things didn’t change though, like Charlie who is never seen but only heard via an intercom. Also the storyline still follows closely a notorious ‘scapegoat family’ who tries to undermine the activities of the angels for selfish reasons.

Read: The Top Is A Mirage, No One Can Get There, Not Even You

Similar to the prequel, the angels are portrayed as smart, very attractive and beautiful, which makes it easy to take down their male opponents with seductive antics that later metamorphoses into a fistfight.

Naomi Scott played the character Elena who was a skilled engineer. She developed a wireless new technology that could provide clean energy. After a trial, she finds out that her new invention can be exploited and weaponized. All attempts to bring this to the notice of her boss, Sam Clafin (Alexander Brok) fails.

To ensure Elena is quiet about it, Clafin who makes up part of the antagonist in the movie tries to assassinate her but Charlie’s Angels rescue her and try to keep her safe. The Angel’s also tried to ensure the device does not get in the wrong hands.

To cut the long story short, I will score the movie 5 out of 10. It lacked originality. Mid-way into the movie I could already predict the end. The script seemed like it was directed without proper planning.

However the lapses, I must say kudos to the actors who tried to bring their characters to life. Actors like Djimon Hounsou, Naomi Scott and Kristen Stewart, were my favourite.

In addition, I was dazzled by the effortless show of beauty and colour on the screen. Also, it registered in my consciousness that teamwork always wins. Talk of girl power and female empowerment?  the action-comedy did not fall short.

If anyone is to blame for Charlie’s Angels 2 excellence drought, the writer and production team should be.

Click Here To See More Reviews Of Your Favourite Movies

 

2 min read

Ain’t we all hypocrites?  Let us not stress it too much, most times when people want to relate with hypocrisy, it is always about our faith- how as a Christian or Muslim, you have faulted in ways that prove you to be one who has flaws, but let’s take a shift from the whole story to a reality that we choose not to talk about in the mundane Nigerian society. “Gays and Lesbians are humans, and some of them happen to be Nigerians too, how is it that we don’t hear about them as we hear about the LGBTQ community in America?” We are hypocrites!

Just recently, it became a criminal act under section 214 of the Criminal Code, that people of the same sex be found indulging in love related kinds of relationships. This is little compared to the Sharia law on LGBTQ.

While this might seem typical and normal to most of us, we should also know that this doesn’t mean that there are no homosexuals in the country, we just choose not to recognize them because of some beliefs that we have accepted over time.

homosexuals
When two people of the same sex agree to a date and love each other in sickness and in health, for better or worse, it becomes a union bound by consent.
READ: “I love you, no homo”

One fundamental aspect of the constitution of the country is the right to freedom of expression. It is the freedom of expression that allows a person to be able to make a choice of his or her own partner. For crying out loud, Nigeria is regarded as a secular country, and by default, what I accept as the right shouldn’t in any way affect you because we are relative beings with relative minds.

Personally, I feel that we have gone too far by making homosexuality a criminal offense, and the 14 years sentence is just the height of it. Let us think about it logically, when a person commits a crime, it is often said that such a person contravenes the rights of the generality of humans residing in a locality- in this case, Nigeria. How does one person being a lesbian or gay, make him a criminal to be likened to a killer or an Armed robber? This is no doubt the height of our hypocrisy.

READ:  Is Shame Always  a Factor

When two people of the same sex agree to a date and love each other in sickness and in health, for better or worse, it becomes a union bound by consent. It becomes a typical marriage that was entered into by right-thinking minds who are able to make decisions for themselves and for their future. However, when we take a stance against these people just because they are of the same sex, what does it say about us? Ain’t we all hypocrites? 

 

2 min read

Dear Mutterers, it gives me great pleasure to communicate with you all through this medium.  An occurrence has left me shocked for days now and it’s gotten me thinking about how we humans can be though.

So here’s the gist; my supposed “best friend” just gave birth and the funny thing is I had no idea she was even pregnant. So shocking right? Especially knowing we are best friends.

This is someone I grew up with and we’ve strong bonds, although a change of house location created a long-distance we still try to keep in touch and check up on one another often. 

READ: FRIENDSHIP IS A RUSE

On finding out she had given birth, I had to go through our chats to see if there were any loopholes I probably missed but it’s been back to back of enjoyable chats and checking up on one another and not once did she mention the word ‘Pregnancy’. Lest I forget, I got the news of her delivery via her brothers WhatsApp status. Oh my WOW! I looked so shocked and stupid at the same time. 

Some of you might begin to reason, maybe we had a fight or something, but hell No! Nothing of such. I held her in high esteem, I could swear she hadn’t popped her cherry yet. How can someone you love, trust and hold in high esteem do such to you, it then means such a person can hurt you right?

betrayal
Was it shame?
READ: WHEN THEY DONT TELL YOU

Yes, I am happy for her, I mean everyone is happy to receive the news of a newborn but sincerely I’m pained, this is a betrayal.  Pained especially because I had to reach out to her first and say congratulations and she just said “thank you” and locks up like nothing happened or I don’t deserve an explanation and then had the guts to ask when I will be paying her a visit.

Somehow I regret reaching out first only to get such nonchalant response. I should have just laid low and pretended like I saw nothing and wait for her to break the news herself anytime she felt. It’s all good though. It’s a cold world and like the singer, Popcaan said in his track ‘Silence’, “It’s so hard to trust your enemy at the same time, so hard to trust your friend”. Indeed the world is electric, anything can shock you.

READ: HAVE YOU MET THEIR OTHER CLOSE FRIENDS?

Maybe somewhere along the line, I went wrong.  Maybe she never regarded me as a best friend. Been asking myself too many questions, I feel so betrayed or was it the shame of giving birth out of wedlock that made her hide it? how do I solve this? Have you ever been betrayed by a loved one?

2 min read

I belong to a little group of sisters and one of us was recently proposed to by her long-time boyfriend. It’s a thing of joy yeah? Of course, we were all happy for her, especially knowing that society reckons it an icing on the cake for every lady.

A few moments later …“Thanks, **** for a new beginning”, my beloved friend had written on her social media page. I automatically got bemused. Why do women feel thankful to a man that proposes to them?

READ: 6 THINGS EVERY MAN WILL CONSIDER BEFORE PROPOSING

I began to relate it to my own man.  Apparently my man thinks he is doing me a favour by travelling down to Lagos before Connecting to Portharcourt where he stays. During one of our conversations, he said “I’m doing this because I love you. When a man loves a woman, he can go to any extent to prove his love”. Minutes later, I called and told him to change his flight plan and that I would want a man who would do things for us and not because he wants to prove anything…funny right?

READ: PROS AND CONS OF SINGLEHOOD

Love is commitment. Commitment, on the other hand, is an INTENTIONAL thing.  Nothing comes freely to a man, we are not natural doers but those who DO are those who make a conscious effort to growth and commitment.

when a man finds a wife

I know in this part of our world, women are taught to adore men like their Lord and personal saviour. But remember the Bible has that when a man finds a wife, he finds a good thing. Amid the cliches and religious sayings, can we women just wake up!!! Can we see above the stereotypical sayings and take hold of our lives?

No woman should feel thankful because a man proposed to her because in the long run and in the corner of the man’s heart, there is something in it for him. No man would choose a liability to be in charge of his future!

In my own opinion, If anyone would be thankful, it should be the man. After all, the woman has more to give. I shouldn’t be thankful to wanna add light to your life even if I am, I would rather bury such feeling in my closet.

READ: STUPID THINGS JUST TO GET HER ATTENTION

Beloved women, I know in this world of ours, we have to wait for a man to do justice to whatever, but can we at least protect our dignity and self-esteem? It’s all we’ve got. When all is gone and we are old and grey, that might be the only thing we can hold on to even up until our deathbeds. Can we at least die in peace???

 

This article  was written by Taiwo Omotesho, owner of @tash_props on Instagram 

3 min read

There are certain cultural practices peculiar to every tribe that would elicit a puzzled reaction from an outsider. 

For instance, in Tiv culture, it is customary for a husband to let his wife spend a night with his male guest. I don’t know if this culture is still practiced. In certain parts of Yoruba land, if someone farts, it is akin to them hurting themselves and if it is done in public, those around are supposed to console the farter ( I coined this word). Odd, right? An incident happened some years back that still leaves me wondering if an outsider would find certain cultural practices of my tribe repulsive.

When I was 10-years old, my friend, Abu, and I went to visit a mutual friend, Jamiu. The visit was occasioned by a football match we had agreed to play with kids from the next block. Jamiu, our star player, was conspicuously absent so our captain delegated two of us to go and fetch him.

READ: 10 bizarre practices around the world that will shock you

We went to Jamiu’s house and met them having lunch, Amala and stew made with chinge( termite). That was their delicacy so we weren’t surprised at the combo. They offered us food but we declined. We stated our mission and since he was almost done with his food, he told us to wait.

All of a sudden, we heard a thunderous sound. The walls vibrated and I can swear I felt an earth tremor. Guess where the sound emanated from? It came from Jamiu’s dad! The man unashamedly farted! No sooner had he farted than the entire family started saying, “Pele, Sir! Pele, Sir! Pele Sir! Pele, Sir!” In the Yoruba language “Pele” means “Sorry”.

An overpowering stench permeated the room. I was nauseous and I felt choked. It was as if I was in a gas chamber. While I was disgusted and beside myself with rage, Abu’s reaction was that of confusion, amusement, and disbelief. He started to giggle. When I saw him giggling, my disgust gave way to amusement and I almost burst into laughter but I managed to stifle it.

culture

Mama Jamiu looked at us angrily and said,” Won’t you say sorry? Don’t you have home training?” We said sorry to Baba Jamiu multiple times in quick succession. In fact, Abu and I tried to outdo each other in saying sorry, just to prove that we had home training.

READ: Why your home is not the Best

The smell that enveloped the room was suffocating. Just imagine the stench caused by the putrid smell of a carcass, the pungent smell of rotten eggs and stew made with termite. That was how bad the odor was and a miasma hung in the room until we left. If there were an infant in the room, I have no doubt that it would have choked to death.

READ: Dead Gaze! “Stop staring at my boobs”

In their culture, breaking wind, another word for farting, is seen as perfectly normal and nothing to be ashamed of. In another culture, it is mortifying and considered antisocial behavior.

Are there cultural practices peculiar to your tribe that you think an outsider would frown upon? Have your say in the comment section.

 

Note: This article was written by Aminu Darius, owner and publishing editor of Cevenade.com