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3 min read

I like to go to a new environment with a clean slate. I am not a fan of having friends go to some particular environments with me or me having to familiarize myself with an old acquaintance in a new environment. I love it all brand new.

So I thought I got it all covered when I enrolled in a gym quite a distance from my house. It’s always been a good ride though, knowing you get to flow with people who don’t even know jack about you and you too knowing zilch about them.

Read: About Muttering Minds

I have been enjoying the flow at the gym until recently when I found out a guy there happens to know one of my dad’s old workers (sacked). Being in tune with the character of the ex-worker, I tried not to familiarize myself with the guy in that area especially because I was trying to avoid gossip.

But can you imagine what happened today *hard face*… I was enjoying the moment digging deep on some heavy squats only for the guy to look me in the eye and say… “You! I heard that you are a silent killer.” Excuse you!!  Did you just say that to me? I queried in my mind.

To salvage the almost tensed up mood, I responded with a fake smile and asked: “From who?” He said I shouldn’t worry that he’s doing some investigations about me. Wow! I have never received such a stupid response from anyone in a long time. I leave the gym daily without thinking of you, but your case is different, you leave and investigate me on a daily right?

Read: Stupid Things Just To Get ‘Her’ Attention

I ignored him completely… O not completely per se,  all the while I kept on with the squats, all I could think of was that his source was none other than the recalcitrant ex-worker. It has to be him, such a loose who talks like he’s about to win a trophy for it.

Who knows what other information he must have fed the guy with. Imagine someone I haven’t had a well-rounded one-minute conversation with having the impression that I am a silent killer. So ridiculous.

Image result for mutual friends
Good riddance to bad rubbish.

Hey Mutual! Take A Chill Pill

Mutual connections/friends freak me out. Do you know me from high school or college? Privileged to work in the same office? Take a chill pill.

The girl you knew in high school who used to wet the bed no longer does. Why narrate the tale to co-workers on how she was disgraced?

Read: Wait! Have You Met Their Other Close Friends Yet?
Image result for girls gossiping
What happens in high school stays in high school

The boy who was expelled in high school for having sex with a girl after night-prep is perhaps older and wiser now. Stop denting his name at work.

You will agree with me that our years in high school were the most adventurous formative stage of our childhood. We did much silly rubbish but thank God we are wiser now (I like to believe more than half of us are).

I get very unsteady anytime I bump into someone mutually connected in an unfamiliar environment especially the ones from high school. In split seconds my brain begins to joggle tons of questions. What is she doing here? Does she know anyone I know? I hope we don’t exchange numbers because I am not meeting up!

Dear Seekers, Know This!

You are very wrong if you entertain tales like this. Yes, I understand some individuals enjoy feeding people’s heads with ideas about other people or with excavated past results, but some of you push for it. 

The moment you hear“I know this chic, we attended the same high school”, your antennas grow wings. “Oh really, what about her? Gist me o”, you keep bugging until you get what you want. 

Like hellooooo…!! If you feel the need to know someone better,  why meet them from another person’s point of view? Some of you even after meeting a new friend, instead of being patient with the person and nurturing the friendship,  you assume the role of undercover agents. You go about asking people/close parties questions like…“how is she”“how does she behave”“Is she seeing anyone?” and so many other irrelevant questions. Stop It!



3 min read

When The Rebels Disappoint…

“Hi Sophie, good morning. How far, were you able to read English for Journalism Course?” I asked with my hopes up, so sure she was going to say No.

“Hi, Doris! Yes, I have started. The course actually got interesting. Beside hubby encouraged me to begin”. There goes Sophie’s response. 

On God, I wish I had a golf ball to throw at her skull so I could get her thinking straight. How could she have? 


Here’s what happened Prior to this… In a bid to make us better journalists, the publishing editor where we work made it mandatory for us to study a Journalism course on Coursera and failure to do so will involve higher authorities and pay slash.

I was not going to study the course, at least not this past week. Asides that I got pissed at the threat to improve my skill, I was ill and had a lot of activities to cover this past weekend. 

Getting to work yesterday, aka D Day, a select few of my colleagues who had initiated a mini-revolt over the course last week began speaking some English I couldn’t comprehend. 

ME: Did you read the course?

Person 1: Errrrm kinda, I just glanced through last night.

Person 2: Not really, I watched the videos, it was quite helpful.

Person 3: I’m almost done with the course.

At this point, I knew that my adversaries had caught up with me.

Misery Loves Company

Well, that’s enough about me. Many times we wish we were sunk in the same predicament with our friends and that’s because It makes it bearable. Does it mean we don’t wish them well? No. It only goes to show how well misery loves company

A person who reads day and night to pass an exam only to end up failing won’t be as sad if she knows her close friends failed it too.

Read: Friendship Is a Ruse

A lady who is single somewhere at the back of her mind wishes her friends were single too. Don’t get me wrong, it’s not like she’s jealous but if the status were even, it will allay the burden of questioning one’s worth.

This might rub off as silly but then it’s one of the genuine qualities that validates our human nature. We are this way. No one wants to be left behind especially when it has to do with a failing remark.

My Adversaries Caught up but it was a Draw

Now back to my story…

“How many of you are done with the English for Journalism course”…the boss charged.

Wow! No hands were up. Not even Sophie’s or the recalcitrant child who told me he watched only the videos. 

I got saved yesterday yippy!

I have never been this relieved in a long time at work. Guess what, all our names were filed to the HR. All the while in my mind I was singing sweet praises to God. What if she gave a hall pass to those who haven’t completed it at least? I would have been the scapegoat of the company knowing fully well Christmas has been long gone.

Read: Why Are You Not Crying 

I got saved yesterday yippy! It’s a lesson. Catch me next Monday defending the course.  Heaven knows I wouldn’t take this grace for granted. 


2 min read

Friendship is good but it is also a ruse. O yes! I said it… perhaps a subliminal ruse to some but it is definitely a ruse.

Of what good is friendship if I cannot manipulate you once in a while? We all want someone that can be all out and there for us, that’s the major reason why we make friends.

It is a lie when you say “For any reason, I cannot take advantage of my friends”.  That is a lie. Maybe you need to revise the meaning of the word ‘advantage’. We take advantage of friendship in different ways. Let me state some examples… You are supposed to meet up with a friend to go somewhere together yet you keep delaying. You say you are close but meanwhile, you are still in your house. The level of speed you invest in getting ready to meet with your so-called buddy is definitely way different from what you give your boss or a business I right? This is you taking advantage of friendship.

Imagine you needed to get front row at a concert and your close friend happens to have free access. If they denied you the chance wouldn’t you begin to question your friendship with them?

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Friendship is a well-struck deal.

A person sees you and wants to be friends with you, don’t get too excited, find out what they want. At the initial stage, it can be hard to tell, even they themselves might not know what they want from you but pretty soon the need(s) starts to manifest. 

Every friend wants something, every friend has a reason if not reasons why they are still friends with you. At some point, they might have thought about leaving your ass, but that reason keeps them going.

If an old friend suddenly starts with the love and affection all again ask them: “This thing you seek, was there no one out there to give to you?”. 

READ: The 3 Kinds of Friendships

Let me ask you, “Why do you still have phone numbers of people you haven’t spoken to in years?”,  is it mere laziness to clear them? Of course not. What keeps you from deleting is because you take solace in the fact that they might still be able to perform the roles they performed when you first met or they could something different in the future. 

If you call friendship a game, you are right. Nobody makes friends for the sake of it. Even kids. If the reason is that you make them smile, then subliminally that is what makes them stick with you.

2 min read

So one Saturday morning while conversing with my younger brother on the phone on some house gist,  we were having some good banter until he asked out of the blues“Marvin said I should ask if you are at Onyi’s marriage introduction.” 

Hmmm! In split seconds my brain literally bounced. I didn’t know how to feel about the question but a huge part of me was definitely confused. First! Which Onyi…Second! Would the Onyi I know keep me in the dark concerning her introduction?

In the wake of my confusion I managed to ask “Which Onyi” He answered rhetorically “Which one before?” It was actually the ‘Onyi’ I knew. “Ooooooo, I’ve been very busy, but mehn I am so counting down for the wedding”…this was me feigning that I was aware but couldn’t make it. I mean I had to do that. 

After the call, l started to look for every reason why she wouldn’t have told me. I began buying various excuses on her behalf. The only thing I could lay hold of as tangible was that she always complained I was too busy and was fond of last last-minute decline of invites. That was it right? Even if it might not have been, I had to choose it as my truth.

“Well introductions are not so important, Its the first official meeting of both families…the wedding is the big deal” this was me still consoling myself even if she still hasn’t told me till date🙂.

Me searching for a thousand and one reasons why she didn’t tell me😂😂

More often than not, we are pissed when we hear something about our ‘friends’ from someone else. We cannot wrap our heads around why they didn’t tell us, but wait! before you scream betrayal, How much of a friend are you to them, compared to the ones they told? 

READ: Did you ever kept secrets from your love ones?

A person might have a hierarchy of ten close friends, and has a slot for three, how do you think they will make their choice? Of course, it has to be the top three on their list and if you happen to be number four, sorry!

Looking from another angle, we all have different ways of processing information. If I got a heavy gist to share, I know the friends to tell immediately and the ones to tell later after the dust has settled. It doesn’t involve hierarchy sometimes.

Likewise seeking advice on certain issues and ideas for upcoming projects, I know who to call among my friends.

At the end of the day, it’s different friends for a different case for me.

You will be surprised to find out where a person places you in their lives but most importantly respect it. If a friend doesn’t tell you about something it’s not an avenue to get angry or go ahead to confront them. 

READ ALSO: Three Ways Confront Someone

As much as it might hurt, it’s was not your time to be aware. Wait for your turn no matter how close you think you are to them.

Well…they might never  tell you afterall😎.

2 min read

You know you can see two people together every time, going about the same stuff, eating side by side in the cafeteria, laughing at the same jokes, sometimes wearing the same outfit, plying the same route, etc. but they are not actually friends.

This habit is most common with students, we all need something from one another and so we form allies. We need someone to help us lobby our names on the attendance sheet whenever we will be missing lectures, someone to give the silent calls and codes during exams, etc.

Read: Friendship is a Ruse

Often, It is not only two individuals who form this kind of union, most times it is usually up to a cartel number, you see a group of four or five people walking together and going about the same stuff but more than half the time, they are not friends, only together for a reason.

I remember following this ritual when I was in college. Four ladies who connected because of school work, weekends were not an option, but you see Mondays until Fridays, we will practically blow up each other’s phones with rings. “Babe, what’s up? Are you coming to lectures? Mr O said we will be writing a test, please reserve a space for me”…similar needs like this, we will always request from one another. We knew we weren’t friends. But guess what! We worked things out. Through the heat of various requests, we were able to figure one another out, knowing what each other likes and dislikes and viola! We are still friends till today.

Read: The Friends Chart; When they dont Tell You
not actually friends
Sharing good moments together does not mean you are friends.

Why am I writing this? Most times we deliberately form these allies, other times it happens subconsciously. You just find yourself always with a particular person or a mini group. Some people get it wrong, they think they have made friends and begin to scream betrayal when the person they thought they had made friends with crosses over to another party.

Never be foolish to think you are friends, at least not immediately. When a group is no longer serving its purpose, the ones who knew the core ingredient that attracted them to the group always leave because they invested no affection.

Read: Why you should say No even when convienient

Not every two individuals you see together always are friends. I’m sure you have an idea of what I am talking about. Have you ever asked someone:

You-  Hey! Where is Nancy, we haven’t seen her in a while?

Person- I don’t know, not heard from her in a while too.

You- too! I actually thought you were friends.

Person- Ah really! No!  We are not close o.

And that’s the truth, they are not actually friends but only served the same purpose at the time.


9 min read

Everyone wants to grow old. I mean, I’ve never met anyone who craved badly to kick the bucket in their 30’s or less, except they’re been tormented by poverty and her colleagues; sickness, hunger, beggary, hardship, pity, you know them all. Suicide is the exit. Sometimes I wonder, is it a cliche desire to want to grow old? Or is it something we’ve individually sat down to reflect about and reckoned that we want it… badly enough? If you knew what awaits you in your old age, would you still fancy an entry into the phase?  In my opinion, there are two sides to old age; Beauty and Torment. A man may experience only one, but most men would have their face stuffed on both sides of the plate. At this stage, choice would not be confusion, rather the physical and the supernatural makes the choice for you. 

Find out why loved ones must leave their elderly in an Old People's Home

Who Daddy Was

Watching my father for the past seven years, I have an elevated share of the torment old age gifts. How do I even begin? Imagine this, one person who almost all your life was well forfeited, vigorous, a lion who would protect and a lamb who could be meek, but never weak. His temper was Jehovian, mercurial and we feared him. Discipline was his love language, I can’t throw many stones of fault, he is African. That’s what we do best, beat our children into submission, beat out any cockiness of bravery they might have. I rated him more infallible than a pope and then poof!! Like a wilting flower, his feathers started to shed. There is no other way to sugarcoat this, my old man has dementia. 

Why Do Plants Wilt?

Before the hit, I remember the good young days. My dad nurtured me and my siblings in ‘the way of the truth’. He is(was) a hardcore Christian. My mum who is currently a retired civil servant at a point in our lives, she was redeployed to Abuja from Lagos where she was with the Ministry of Communications. It was a difficult time for us but my dad ascended the task. At that time, it was me, my elder sister, and my two younger brothers. When she traveled to Abuja, she took along the last-born. She tried to come home at least once every two or three months. At the time my dad was an auto-mechanic, and an elder in our religious circle (name withheld). It wasn’t easy raising four boisterous children on his own, and most evenings I could see the strain on his face.

Read: These Scars May Never Die

I would forever be grateful to him. Not once were we made to feel that we were lacking even though we were not financially buoyant. At the time we lived in a one room apartment, popularly called face-me-I-face-you somewhere near Òkòkó, Lagos State, Nigeria. Despite the slow income lifestyle, we attended a private school with a British curriculum (this has been very instrumental in shaping who I am today). As much as he loved to break his back, my father was also a strict disciplinarian.

African Parents, Don't Provoke Your Children -

I remember coming home one day from school and not finding our black and white television where it always sat. Me and my siblings panicked and called the neighbors, the only logical answer was that someone broke in and stole it. We later found out that he was the one that took it away. He said we watched too much TV and he wanted us to take reading seriously. This decision made even more deficient my already weak social life. I had no TV to watch, so I turned to books for entertainment. This pleased my dad to no end even though later on, he would complain about my choice of books when I started reading novels and other genres.

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At about the time I finished primary school, my mum resigned (early retirement). It was also around that time we moved to Badagry where my parents owned a piece of land and had erected a structure. Few months later my immediate younger brother would die of acute malaria. Those were rough times.

old age curse


The Straw That Broke Daddy’s Back

The fact is that, if you don’t have a loved one who suffers dementia, you have no idea how hard it can be. It is very heartbreaking. When can I say he started to deteriorate? In our religious circle, he was an elder a long time before he even got married. He had vast experience, and over the years had taken on a number of key positions. Unfortunately, he was stripped off his eldership due to some decisions he made regarding his children. To spill the beans our religious circle frowns at higher education but he threw caution to the wind and funded our university education. The consequences rattled him badly. 

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Imagine a moment where a title that crowns your whole existence is taken forcefully from you? It was his identity and the lack of it wrecked him into chronic depression. In 2015, when I finished university, I came to meet a man I almost did not recognize. He was a shell of his former self. I was angry. I pitied him. This (and other factors) deepened my disdain for religion in general. We all knew he was depressed, he would drive his tricycle, return home tired and just eat and sleep. Even on Sundays when we did things together as a family, he would just mope around. 

Read: I’ll Never Forgive the Sins of the Church

Depression, Anxiety in old black men

Daddy Now

Dementia is a terrible thing to suffer. It’s mutual suffering for the patient and their loved ones. My dad used to be a very avid reader, a trait I took from him, however, something abnormal started to happen. Gradually he couldn’t pronounce familiar words. His activeness amid his circle of friends too started to wane. It became embarrassing seeing his friends and acquaintances try to juggle his memory and he would just shake his head forlornly. 

Read: 13 Types of Dementia, Signs, Symptoms

As this happened repeatedly, we knew something was wrong. Even my dad knew something was wrong. Often, he would call me aside and tell me he was losing his memory. When I went to his room, I would see notes scattered about, notes he had written to help jog his memory. Being a well educated family, we concluded they were signs of dementia then sought medical help. It’s quite expensive. We did a private hospital routine for a while until my mum insisted on trado-medical treatments because it’s more effective and less expensive. My mum is only a pensioner and myself and siblings are ascending the career ladder, we wouldn’t want something that wrecks the entire ship.

Epidemiology and risk factors of dementia | Journal of Neurology, Neurosurgery & Psychiatry

Dementia has no relapse. Once you have it, it’s progressive. It only gets worse. The only thing you can do is treat it so it can be managed. Now he can’t remember his children’s names and only calls us by our pet names. I’m Omo ìyá (mother’s child), as he fondly calls me. Me and my siblings have left home. I go home once in a while to visit. These visits are always bittersweet. There’s my mother looking all frustrated and worn out from all the care, they’ve been married for 32 years. And then dad, asking me the same questions over and over again cause he forgets the answer every five minutes. At first, he sees me, he smiles, and calls me Omo ìyá. Five minutes later, he sees me and he’s asking “When did you get home, have I seen you today?”

Read: Dear Mum, A Curious Conversation we would Never Have

He likes to wander, and nobody goes along with him. My mom just complains, I know she’s scared but I try to make her at ease cause my dad has assured me sometime that when he walks about, his head is clear and he will always know the way back home. I sincerely hope he keeps knowing the way home. 

Wandering & Dementia – Making Sense of It

One terrible thing about dementia is that the patient believes those around them to be their enemies. Strong word? He uses the word enemy to describe my mum sometimes especially when she tries to stop him from going out and wandering. He retorts that she is holding him back. However, his spirituality tames him perfectly. He has never abhorred violence of any kind. 

Read: Dementia diagnosis often comes as part of costly crisis

Having a loved one suffering dementia is not something to be ashamed of. Why should anyone be though? It’s an attendant effect of old age. We’ve done well to inform the neighbors and Landlords Community Association where he was once the financial secretary. Almost everybody knows how to react when he keeps repeating questions. 

5 ways to take care of your aged and sick parents |

Seeing A Parent Fall Sick

Sometimes I ask myself; if my dad had retained his eldership position, would dementia have set in? Probably, I don’t know. What I know is, the fons et origo of his depression was his being yanked off something he obviously loved doing. One thing I’m taking out of all this is never to attach my happiness to anything, or anybody. My dad attached his happiness to his eldership, his religion and fell apart when it was taken from him.

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I love my dad, I know my siblings love him too (it’s so hard to read them). I feel for him. I feel for the loving dad who bought me a bottle of Coca-Cola when I finally learnt how to tell the time correctly. I feel for the loving dad who would trek to my school from his workplace to give me my lunch box when I forgot it at home (I was quite forgetful as a kid). I think he deserves more. I know he deserves more. I also feel for my mum. They love each other deeply, I admired how he was always attentive to her needs and especially loved how he brightened whenever she was around. I can’t imagine how it must be for her now, seeing her once active husband now behaving like an infant. It must be very tough on her.

old age curse

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It’s painful seeing a parent fall sick especially in their old age where it hits you that they would not be here forever. And a hurtful truth is that life is moving by too fast, you cannot offer them your presence as much as you wished. Taking care of a sick parent (a loved one generally) comes with every shade of fear, it exhausts you emotionally, physically, and financially. Whenever my phone rings, and it’s my mum, I’m scared of what she might say. One way or the other, we’ve all had our share of fear of losing our parents. Some have already lost, some have won the battle that may only last a while, and some would have their experience soon. I’d like to learn about your own personal experience/ unique ways in catering for your parents. Importantly, what do you reckon as best ways we can care for our parents in their old age or in sickness, despite chasing a busy career path or better put amid trying to find our footing in real adulthood. 

The Old Age Gamble

Like I asked earlier, if you knew what awaits you in your old age, would you still fancy an entry into the phase? Dementia is one out of a hundred illnesses that is associated with old age. You don’t know what will happen, the phase is a gamble. I’ve heard some folks say they do not want to live beyond 70, because it can be so stressful. Beyond the age, you have no dream of becoming anything, you just want to witness what your children would become. The excitement of living is dependent on what others can do for you or achieve for you. Except the rich folks who are a bit different in the sense that they do not become a financial burden to their loved ones. Would you like to turn old and gray? What are you most afraid of that could befall your old age? And the ultimate question, is old age a blessing or a curse? Let’s discuss in the comment section.

7 min read

Yeah you know it! that angelic yet raunchy stare she gives you when you’re hitting the G-spot…that desperate facial, is she crying for pleasure or for more pleasure? You pump it up, wearing the energy of a horse on a race track. It’s too much pleasure now, her legs begin to suffer a seizure but surely they wouldn’t wilt rather she’s mumbling in tongues that translates a quest to devouring every last crumb from your being. Oo bet she’ll. Now you’re staring at her eyes to solicit more validation and you’re almost blinded by spicy passion. Hell yeah! it makes you feel like a man right? An empowered man with a top-notch ego right? 

30 Day Sex Position Challenge– Day 25 | loveandpleasurecoaching

I bet you had not the slightest idea that this ‘ego empowerment scheme’ you profit off from her legs quivering could all turn to dust one day. A day when you desperately want to race like horse and in fact prior you’ve bragged about the chronicles of your sex game but unfortunately forces beyond you makes your cum come barely 2 minutes after hitting the warm hole. Shit! This is every man’s nightmare. How do you tell her it’s not your fault? That you’re usually not like that? Perhaps she’s too sweet you couldn’t resist falling your own hands? O jeezz!! She’s gonna tell her friends that you’re a ‘one minute man’ or very unlikely to share in your embarrassment and keep mum. A lot of thoughts running miles in your head. I don’t know if you’ve been here before, well I’ve been down this squashed ego road… would tell you about it.

Read: Let’s Play A Game… Fetish or Obsession or Both?

Enough! I Will No Longer Be Disappointed by African Men in the Bedroom - OkayAfrica


A Sex King In The Making

Attaining reasonable mature age, I was very sexually active. I remember having sex more than 300 days in 365 days in a year. Yup! That’s how much bed power I wielded. I remember going seven rounds in a night with my girlfriend at the time. Or was it a time when a lady fainted while having oral sex with me? She couldn’t stand the depth of the feeling. Then, when it came to sex, the barest minimum I could offer a lady was 3 rounds. No less but could be more. I oozed enormous ego especially when she’s telling me over chats how I’m the best thing that’s ever happened to her pussy. O surely I did make a lady drip drip…sheeshh! Common guys, don’t give me that look. Wanna deny that a lot of our ego doesn’t depend on how much we’re able to treat her right in bed? Well mine wholesomely does. 

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learn how to increase sex power in summer

A King’s Nightmare

Happily late last year, I got a girlfriend, which would soon metamorphose a sour encounter. A sex king could no longer have a lasting erection, I had now become a man walking around with a not literal tag that projected “One Minute Man”. Though I would quickly have erection like I should have but not as strong as it should be; compared to those days where I literally would feel every single vein in my penis when I’m fully aroused. How do I explain all my brags? She expected a horse but all she got was a man whose erection became flaccid at the touch of her hands repeatedly. And when it’s a ‘good day’ and I arrive at the mountain of penetration, my sperm acts like they’re being chased down by a ghost, running for their lives which makes them sprinkle out in barely one minute. Gosh! I bet she hated me at every try.  The only silverlining left in my arsenal was my oral sex skill. I had mastered it so well so it was easy to make my woman reach orgasm.

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Though my woman never complained about my poor timing cum shots, I wished I could do what I used to do. Painfully, I also observed that she never demanded sex from me, she never initiated love making too. I started to nurse the idea that I became sexually weak because I was aging, though I’m not 40 yet. I read an article that said sex shouldn’t be more than 2 minutes and that gave me a sense of hope. 

This Is How Long Sex Should Last (From a Woman's Point of View) | GQ


Pacifying My Fallen Crown 

What I resolved was to ensure my lady orgasms first through oral sex before I reach to penetrate knowing that I would cum in two minutes. The trick was to elongate my head game with hopes that she doesn’t take cognizance of how quickly I ejaculated.  Another disappointing part of the issue is that I had to wait for at least 30 minutes before journeying second round, that’s if I had the chance to try.

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I became desperate for a solution that I decided to take a root drink for sex enhancement. I will never forget my terrible experience. I took the drink 20 minutes before my lady arrived and I was hugged with a serious headache. Although we had two rounds of sex which I lasted a little longer but I felt less than my normal self. I became an empty man who desired sex most times but would quench the desire knowing that I could only offer weak strokes. Rather sex, I would masturbate, risking the cons. 

4 ​Sex Supplements That Work - Erectile Dysfunction Supplements

A King’s Redemption

Like having a weak sex game is not punishment enough, the universe had to plague me with a throat problem; however, the life style preceding this diagnosis soon became a solution I was blind to the entire time. I was told to avoid soft drinks and cold water as they were notable triggers which I faithfully avoided. From baby steps avoidance, I was able to permanently halt the entry of soft drinks in my system for three months. Also for some maybe weird replacement, I nurtured the habit of eating dates and tiger nuts. 

Read: Sex and Spirituality; And What If He’s a Virgin At 30

In the third month of abstinence from soft drinks, my lady came around with plans to sleep over and leave the next day. I joined her in the shower that night and couldn’t resist making love to her. We started foreplaying and surprisingly, I realised that my erection became even fuller with charged veins scavenging for a warm hole. I hit it and kept at it for over five minutes before carrying her to the bed where I kept sending her into space for over 15 minutes. As much as I felt proud I could make her scream for the first time, I also felt much surprise. Is this me? Is the king back? My excitement held no barricade. Could you believe we went an extra five rounds that night?? It was such a passionate moment, and one of relief too. Tell you what? My beautiful lady who had the intention of spending one night, spent two days and returned a few days after to spend a month with me. 

10 Reasons Shower Sex Is Seriously The Worst And Basically Ruins Sex So You Should Never Do It


Saying ‘Hi’ To Memory Lane

After our irresistible love making, my surprise grew to curiosity, I was bent on knowing what happened. Putting the pieces together, I needed no soothsayer to tell me I had lost my game to excess sugar. Unbeknownst to me every time I consumed a soft drink, my sex prowess kissed six feet a closer chance, it weakened. Coca-cola was my number one brand, while Pepsi, an alternative best friend. I would consume either like water, hardly would I have a meal without a bottle of Coke or Pepsi. 

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Whew!! I had defeated the elephant that tormented me for more than a year. I used to think my lady hated sex, I recall how quiet she usually is whenever we made love, she would only make sounds during oral sex and go completely silent during penetration. But now, she’s a screamer,  a noisemaker and prayer warrior. Babe now holds my head screaming, calling me beautiful names and praying for me. She now calls me ‘Ife’, chai, good sex is beautiful, dont let anyone tell you otherwise. Another beautiful thing is that She has come to see third and fourth rounds as her legitimate right, so we usually begin another round right from the bathroom while cleaning up. Can proudly say that I wasn’t actually getting old, but was careless with my diet. I have kissed both soft drink and masturbation final goodbyes. Again I’ll reiterate that good sex is beautiful and importantly I’m still a SEX KING!!

Black Couple GIFs | Tenor

Reflecting on all that transpired, I have questions… To the men, how important is performance to you? I confided in a friend who told me that he’ll care less if he can’t satisfy a lady for a lengthy time. I perceived it as a pretentious answer though. I feel like a huge part of my ego depends on satisfying her in bed, do you feel the same way or am I weird? Also have you had experiences similar to mine or scares? share with me and your solution, a fellow king reading might be in need of it. Now ladies, sincerely how do you feel when a man doesn’t satisfy you as you want? Would you call it quits on a one-minute man? And now general questions; how long should an ideal sex last?  What’s your take on sex enhancement products? Join the conversation in the comment section below 😃👇👇.

9 min read

Majority of the world believe incest is a sin, but is it really? Especially when it’s between two consenting adults? 

The first time I had sexual thoughts about my mother I was about 8 or 9 years old.  At that time we used to live in an old kind of run down house and were quite poor. The bathroom had a door on it with a glass pane that was broken. So you could look through and see whoever was showering.  I used to secretly look through the broken pane and enjoy the delicious splash of the water over her naked breasts and masturbate while watching her. At that age, I never had an orgasm but was still thrilled and felt a deep erotic charge whenever I had the chance to watch her. It was always a huge risk that I would get caught by my father, so I was always scared and aroused at the same time, and I made sure that I didn’t stay watching too long so that I wouldn’t get caught.

At about the age of 10 years old I first became aroused by my mothers’ lingerie and knickers. I used to secretly sniff her knickers when she was out and particularly enjoyed the musky smell of her pussy juice on her dirty knickers. It was a smell that I adored and I’ve always loved the smell of pussy since then.

smelling pant fetish


When I was about 12 years old my mother gave me a book on puberty and it had a chapter in it on how to masturbate. I was really surprised at how modern and open minded my mother seemed to have become because when I was younger I’d once asked her where babies came from and she told me a false fairy story about how the stalk brought babies and then they were cut out of her stomach. I knew she was lying, but I just wanted to see what she would say. I already knew how babies were born.

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At the age of 13 my father died. He’d been sick for about a year and he knew he was going to die so he went to Nigeria to die.  My mother went to Nigeria to conduct the funeral and took my two youngest siblings with her and left the rest of us with friends and relatives for the duration. Eventually she got back.

15 years later, my siblings and I had grown into different paths but I agreed to come home and look after my mother. Her place was also handy as it was close to where I worked and I saved a lot of money on rent.

sex with my mother after my father passed


A Helping Hand… Indeed

I was 39 and I was living with my mother. After my father had died my mother had never had any other partner.  She said that she didn’t want any man to try and control her, or tell her how to raise her children. 

This Sunday morning, I had music playing quite loudly so I didn’t hear my mother calling me. She decided to come up to see me and tell me that she wanted to talk to me. We were always very open with each other about everything. We were both relaxed about nudity between us and had become very close as she didn’t have many good friends and I was the only one she could talk to. She knew that I sometimes had sex with men as well as with women, and she hoped I would settle down with the right man or woman. 

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Students explain, celebrate bisexuality pride – The Daily Eastern News

She came into the bedroom and saw me while I was naked masturbating and moaning, but I hadn’t cum yet. She looked at me and watched me for a few seconds and then smiling she said, ‘Let me help you’. I was surprised and delighted and embarrassed at the same time. I couldn’t hide my erection which was full and hard. I was torn between saying “no, it’s ok, I’ll do it myself” or stopping and getting dressed to have the conversation. She said “Let me get some baby oil”. I was surprised but also touched by her caring support and so aroused that I didn’t want to stop masturbating at that moment. 

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I didn’t object, and had secretly and half ashamedly hoped that one day she would enjoy seeing me masturbate and had fantasies that she would want to lick and suck my dick. She went to my cupboard and got out the baby oil, opened the top and poured some on her hands. Then she sat beside me on my bed, moved closer and took my dick in her hand. She said, “Son, just relax and be yourself, I know what you need. I’m your mother and I love you”. I knew that it was unusual but at the same time I thought that she’s my mum and she knows me as well as I know myself, and after all no one would ever know.

masturbating with my mother

She took off her nightie and I delighted in seeing my mum’s hairy pussy which I have wanted to fuck and suck, and I fantasized about burying my head in her hairy bush. I didn’t mind that her breasts were flat with thick long nipples.

Read: Are You Worried About the Disgrace or?

My mum knew that I had some sex toys under my bed and she bent down and took out a soft small black rubber penis shaped dildo.  “Do you want me to use this on you?” she said.  I shook my head but really wanted to nod my head and say yes. Instead I said, “No not yet, please keep masturbating me and suck me first”. I loved the way she sucked my dick, slow and sweet and masturbating me lovingly at the same time. She caressed my dick slowly and gently and gradually masturbating me faster and faster, and when she felt I was about to cum she would stop for a few seconds.  I moaned in ecstasy and we looked into each others eyes. She masturbated me and sucked my dick until I cum in her face and on her breasts.  Then she sucked and swallowed my cum sweetly and lovingly, and put her tongue in the hole at the top of my dick and sucked all the last drops of cum from my dick. She then pulled my head to her mouth and kissed me so deep that I too tasted and swallowed my cum from her mouth. 

Read: Inheriting Your Parents Enemies

After I had cum, we lay still for a little while. Me and my mother wrapped in each others arms. Soon she began kissing me on my mouth and I parted my lips and opened my mouth for her to put her tongue in. I began caressing her nipples and she pushed her breast to my mouth for me to suck. She played with one of her nipples while I sucked her other nipple.  I loved sucking her breasts and imagined that I was a child and wished that she had milk that I could suck. While I sucked her breasts, I began fingering her pussy slowly with one finger and then two fingers, and fucked her pussy with my fingers for a while and she moaned with joy. Soon she was very wet and I took my fingers out and bent my head between her legs and began licking and sucking her clit and and thrusting my tongue deep in her pussy. Soon she let out a loud moan as she cum in my mouth and shouted “OHH!” as she peed in my mouth.

golden showers with my mum


Guilt, Confusion & Assurance

Afterwards, I felt embarrassed , ashamed and guilty of sin. I had been brought up as a Roman Catholic Christian and I felt sick with disgust at myself. Would I now be condemned to Hell? How can I face my mother again? What does she think and feel? Will she hate me and kick me out? Maybe I should leave and find somewhere else to live? I was shaking and tearful with fear and self-loathing and confusion. I was just about to think of packing my bags when I heard my mother opening the door arriving back from shopping. I decided to try and talk with her and see if it was still possible for us to live together normally after what had happened. 

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My mother said “Are you ok son? Tell me what’s on your mind?”. I said “I’m confused about what happened between us and what we did. I’m scared that we will do it again”. My mother said, “Do you want us to stop? I don’t feel what we did was wrong. You’re an adult and so am I. What we do is our secret. It can be just a lovely experience we had. Did you not like it?”. I said, “I feel a bit ashamed and I’m worried about what if someone finds out? I did enjoy it but I feel guilty because I know that you haven’t had any relationship with anyone for all these years since my dad died. I feel that maybe I was taking advantage of you?”. She said, ”I’m old enough to know and understand what we did was not normal. But not being normal doesn’t mean that it’s wrong. It’s just different. It’s also not wrong because we both wanted it and I know I enjoyed it. I never wanted sex with just anyone. As a woman, I can still get that easily if I want, even though I’m nearly 70. I wanted to make love and we made good love that I enjoyed because I love you son, and I know how much you love me.” I said, “ Should I go and find somewhere else to live?”.

incest relationship with my mother

She said ”I can understand why you would feel the need to do that, but think about the practicalities. You’re not earning much. So you save a lot of money on rent as I only ask you to help with food and bills. So from a practical point of view it makes sense to stay here for at least another 6 months. What do you think about that?”  I said, “ I think that if I stay here then we might be tempted to have sex again.” She said, “No, we wouldn’t have sex again, we would make love. What we did was with caring and feeling and from a place of love. I’m not ashamed. I will make love with you again. But only if you want to.”

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I said, “What if one of my brothers or sisters found out? What if somehow someone in my job found out?”. She said “Do you really think I will tell any of your brothers and sisters that we made love? And I’m sure that you won’t tell any of your friends or work colleagues. So no one will know. No one will find out.”


She Knew All Along 

Same day…I went up to my bedroom, took off all my clothes, and as it was a warm summer night I lay on the bed naked, ready for sleep and work the next morning. I was almost asleep when I heard my mother calling me. I thought that maybe something was wrong or she wanted to talk and had changed her mind and wanted me to leave.  I went downstairs naked and she was also naked on her bed with the soft night time lamp on. Her legs were open and beside her on the bed were her soaking wet panties. 

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She said, ”It’s nice to see your erect cock. But first I want to tell you something. When you were a child I often saw you watching me shower through the broken pane of glass on the door. I didn’t stop you as I wanted you to see what a woman looks like naturally and not get false ideas from porn when you were older.  And I knew that you were sniffing my dirty knickers as the laundry basket was always in the wrong order when I did the washing. ”I was shocked, I responded, ”But what if my father had seen me? He would have beaten me so mercilessly and maybe shouted at you.” She said, “I know you masturbated and cum in my knickers as I could smell that the cum was different from your fathers cum.” I said, “Oh! Now I’m embarrassed and ashamed!”. She said, “It’s ok. How else was a little boy to learn about his sexuality? I have wet my knickers from masturbating and I have put them next to me on the bed for you to play with. Come and lay next to me. I can see from your erect cock that you want me, don’t you?”

bisexual man has sex with his mother

I’m sure you already know what happened next. Sex with my mother became a thing, it happened every other day until she passed away seven years ago. 

Dear reader, having read my experience and how consensual it was with my mother, would you still tag me a sinner? A sinner because what I did is wrong? Like my mother said, something being wrong doesn’t make it a sin. I love histories, and getting immersed in ancient Egyptian stories, I feel no more  guilt finding out that the Egyptians held in high esteem sex between family members to retain heirs to the throne. What makes this age different? I’ll want your sincere comments on this 😶👇👇

9 min read

If you asked 10 men if they’re open to date a virgin lady, 7 of them are sure to slap you back with a resounding ‘NO’. Or maybe it’s all bants when social media is involved huh? Well, I decided to arrive at a bit more practical statistics via our Instagram handle, where I created a poll that read “Guys!! Have you ever disvirgined a lady before?” and tell you what, the result left my jaw ajar. I expected that the number of NO’s would be a far mile away from the “YESES” but could you believe that out of 49 votes, 22 men voted YES?! At this finding, I felt a better justification was to press further, seeking information bearing more depth that either verifies or nullifies certain popular opinions about female virginity.  

Contrary to how the internet is flooded with ladies telling stories about their first sex experience, and men doing same also, I decided to flip the script– telling the stories from the other parties POV. What goes down when a man decides to have sex with a virgin lady ? I sought to explore majorly the emotional/psychological state of the man during the phase (before & after). How long was the wait? How long did it take to attain full penetration? Were they at any point scared? What were the emotions felt during and after? Did the relationship get better or awkward? Would they do it all over again?

benefits of being a virgin couple

Hey Mutterer, below, 3 men share their experience with me. While the emotions portrayed in all three is not a guaranteed mutual feeling for every man, I hope that you find something to hold on to. 

Peer Pressure

I was 22 and she was 18, we were both virgins. One time she came home from school and suggested we tried, I told her I couldn’t because I hadn’t done a thing like that before but she insisted, adding that she has heard lots of stories from her friends in school about how they enjoy sex with their men and was eager to know what it feels like. I remember telling her she was too young and I couldn’t do it because I was a novice. After much pressure I gave in. 

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The first day we tried, it was backbreaking. She kept crying due to pains and my big dick wasn’t helping, it made it worse. I couldn’t bear seeing her in pain so I insisted we stopped, but she wasn’t having it. Very determined. She cried even harder and asked that we continued. However, the long try still wasn’t successful so we fixed another date. First time sex: 5 things that you should know about it -

Before our next meeting, I avoided her, to be sincere, I was hell scared. I didn’t want another round of seeing a woman in pain. Also the thought of blood made me even more scared. However, we fixed a date when no one was home. Before this, I used my phone to research some helpful tips on google, and tell you what, I got a whole lot of tips.

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From my research, I deduced there was no need to rush to penetrate, but it had to be gentle. Start from kissing and caressing and then thorough romance so that she can be wet enough and yearn for the penis. So I followed the script judiciously. I started kissing her from her neck, down other parts of her body. I touched her intensely and intermittently used my hands to caress her clits. I would have tried cunnilingus cause it was among the tips but I had no idea how to at the time. As stated, she started to yearn for the dick so I proceeded.  Although very wet, she still retreated when I sought entry and when I tried using my fingers with hopes that it was a better option she appeared even more scared. I was only able to get as far as her clitoris and revolver. It was like a tug of war. 

The Hymen: Breaking the Myths - Our Bodies Ourselves

Now this time she’s even more wet…I tried with my dick and boom! I was in, I penetrated the hymen. The whole process took close to 2 hours, there was a little blood and she started crying. I got confused and reached to clean her up and console her. She pushed me away and asked me to leave her alone. I didn’t know what to do, but she kept on crying and crying.  I was confused but left. The following day and after, she was avoiding me and wouldn’t speak to me. I was so confused, I mean, she wanted it and now this??

Read: A Long Haul Down My Vagina

After about three days,  she called me and apologized. She said she was happy she felt like a lady and at the same time sad. Sad because her friends in school also told her that when a man has sex with a lady for her first time he would leave her. I assured her that I liked her and she was also my first. I promised her that our love would wax stronger, and really it did, we grew so in love. Going forward we tried severally and for some reason, it was like she got addicted. She’ll ring my phone virtually everyday for us to have sex, we had sex like five times in a week. She also became clingy, called me at all times and said she just wants to hear from me. I could see she was in love or maybe more in love with the sex. I loved her quite all right but hers was more. It was like I used jazz on her.  I wont lie, the sex made our relationship awkward. However, I left for university and lack of communication created a huge gap. She found someone else and reduced the attention towards me. The rest is history.

dating a virgin

She Didn’t Tell Me She Was A Virgin

She was a friend to my cousin. We always met at the village at the end of the year, she comes in on the 31st to leave on the 3rd of January, while I normally stayed for a week or more sometimes. We had been dating for like three years, and the sexual aspect was just kisses and smooching. 

Read: And What If He’s A Virgin at 30?

On the d-day, we left for the village school outside the village, which was our normal spot for making out. She was in jeans with an iron belt and white top. We started making out and it was intense and we decided to take it further. Prior to this, we had never discussed the issue of virginity, I didn’t even think she was a virgin because she stays in Bariga. First, It was very difficult to get rid of the belt, it took like 45mins to do that and pull off the jeans, after which I reached for the condoms in my wallet while we both laid on the floor. I tried to penetrate and noticed that she was in pain and was crying all through. When I was done, I noticed blood stains which were visible on the white pant she wore. I asked her and she confirmed she was a virgin. She kept crying, so I had to pet her for up to an hour. I was begging the whole time because she said I was too rough on her. 

what to know during first sex with a lady

However, she stopped crying and told me to tell her I love her, which I did. She then insisted for one more round, although I was tired and just wanted to sleep but I had to do it for her. We went to the back of the church which was not far from the school to have a quick doggy, it was lovely and she enjoyed it. She kissed me deeply immediately we were done and we both went to our various hut. She left before I woke up. We saw a year later and we continued but lost touch after then.

“I Think I’m Ready”

We were both in love, and had been dating for like a year. She’d talk about some pretty racy shit cause she was into a lot of erotic fiction. We’d mess around, kiss and engage in a lot of oral sex and I’d play with her pussy, but that was about it. I did my best to not pressure her though but still body no be firewood…and she was sexy AF(still is).

Catch Up On: My First Sex Experience Series

One time we were bathing together, I got carried away and tried going pass our normal routine…mehn! it wasn’t funny, I spent the night apologizing because she was in pain. Times where we had normal couple issues she’d always attribute my “behavior” to the fact that we hadn’t had sex bla bla…but I was faithful. I actually loved her and really enjoyed her company so it was only natural for me to perish ideas that involved being with someone else.  

does disvirgining a lady make you clingy?

The D-day was pretty weird lol…I had just resumed for the semester and didn’t tell her cause I wanted to surprise her (I know…romantic b.s) I went to the house of a mutual friend of ours and as expected I met her there, so yeah the surprise went well. We went back to my place that evening and started our usual make out, then oral sex which I was pretty okay with and then the shocker…she said, “I think I’m ready”. I recall asking her like five times  to be sure to avoid messy stories later on. 

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The first few seconds-minutes were a bit of a struggle but with the help of trusty ol’ baby oil we conquered, lol. I did my best to help her through it all by asking her when to stop or if I should pull out. Eventually after a couple thrusts we got the hang of it. I could tell it was still a bit painful for her but I kept on reassuring her and It felt really great for me. We both didn’t cum though but it lasted about 15-20 mins and there was just a little patch of blood on me afterwards. We bathed and slept in each other’s arms.

Guys, Have You Ever Disvirgined A Lady? (How Was The Experience Like?)

The next day we did it again and this time it was better. The only issue was she was getting sore which was majorly my fault cause I hadn’t gotten used to her tempo. Like we got mad closer after it, and she became a freak. We got to experience all the sex styles she’d been reading and also more open to my ideas.  One time she rode me on the decking of an uncompleted apartment close to my place in the view of the full moon and shit. It was wild because that was the spot guys usually smoked. We almost got spotted then we went downstairs into one of the uncompleted rooms and finished there. 

We had great sexual chemistry and moving on from her was really hard cause I was totally invested in her emotionally, physically, mentally and sexually. But I guess we just had to let go at one point. Met up again late last year (we were both single) and the sex was still top notch. If presented with the chance to do it again, I’ll change the settings and make it a bit more romantic, other than that I’ll gladly do it again.disvirgining a lady

My One Cent

Like I stated at the opening, my reason for doing this was to actually see through at least a fraction of what goes on in the minds of men when it comes to disvirgining a lady. Frankly, I feel that looking back, the men reckon it was a beautiful moment shared, especially the third story, who also according to his embellished description was a player but found something to live for. This equally proves that the ‘hard guy’ syndrome can become a melted mountain with the right one. 

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Also importantly, another popular opinion I wanted to verify with this is the statement “Do not have sex with a virgin lady, cause they become clingy”, story one gives me my answer. Then there is the statement “Avoid virgin ladies because they’ll suck in bed”… the three stories especially the last all debunk this. 

Guess what, I also ran a poll for the ladies, I asked “Ladies!! Do you sometimes regret the circumstances surrounding losing your virginity?” 48 voted YES and 39 voted NO.

Hmmmm… on this note, I’ll conclude by asking the following questions; To the men, having read these stories, would you be willing to date a virgin lady? What are your reservations about virginity? And if you have dated one before, what was the outcome? To the ladies, prior to losing your virginity, were you ever shy to say you’re one or proud of it?  Mind sharing your experience too, be it regret or joy? Also if you haven’t scratched this surface, why so? This should be interesting but mostly enlightening for all of us. Kindly leave your comments below 🤗👇👇.

4 min read

Life we say is unfair.  A friend once said to me, “it has to be bad for someone for it to be good for you”… likewise vice versa. In my case, as much as it leaves the other party at an unfair disadvantage, I cannot but be happy for myself.  The only thing I find unfair regarding my experience which I intend to share with you is this statement;  “Marriage is for better or worse, in sickness and in health, till death do us part”. It’s blinding, it makes you not see things clearly even when they’re right before your eyes. In marriage, they say if the other party hasn’t brutally wronged you, then you have no right to walk away. In my eyes, ‘wrongs’ in marriage should not be subjected to a particular pedestal, the littlest of things which is considered flimsy to the majority should not be invalidated. They are also wrongs too. 

I am a married woman who’s in love with another. What could my husband have done to make me have my eyes set on another? Well I don’t have the answers. Twelve years ago when I walked down the aisle with him, I never planned for this to happen. But it is what it is, I’ve found myself deeply in-love with a man 6 years younger than I am. I never knew I had the strength to go through with this, but it remains one of the best decisions I have ever made.

Read: Why I Cheat on my Wife

soulmate after marriage


How We Started Vs How It’s Going

So this fateful day, Andre slid into my DM  to enquire further about a business deal I posted, he liked my response and decided to stick around as a friend. As time went on, we became very cool friends, he was really open about his life and journey and that made me feel so comfortable around him. I started opening up to him about my life as well, business and my worries, and now, he’s so there for me, no matter what. He’s proven to be a good support system, the definition of intentional in a way that makes love refreshing. 

Reading: Why I Love Older Women

Wonder how I can tell Andrea truly loves me? Well love is in the eyes. I see it, I feel it, and in fact breathe it when I’m with him. With him, it’s a ‘we’ thing and not a sole journey. Little things matter when love is involved, we decorated his apartment together, so it feels like home for me. He has essentials in his house for my use whenever I come around,  has my flow chart app on his phone, and he is up to date. He is open about his finances, I know how much he earns, he ensures I get a gift from him always, no matter how little. He fills his fridge with drinks that I like.

soulmate after marriage

Andrea totally understands my pattern and mood, and important to mention how kind he is to people around him too, so I know he’s not just not being sweet to me. He doesn’t judge me, he supports me and pushes me to be a better person. Gosh! He cares so much about me that it scares me. As the sweet girl that I am, I reciprocate all this by loving him against all odds. I’m so used to him that I can’t imagine my life without him, I call him the love of my life, he calls me his sweet face. We are like high school lovers, we are soul mates! He writes the sweetest notes, he is really expressive about his feelings and that has forced me out of my shell too. I can tell him exactly how I feel, how I want to be loved. He allows me to be myself, I don’t have to hide my true and crazy self. He apologizes first when we argue. We throw subtle shade at each other, and we don’t take things personally.



I am not going to talk about the other person, feel free to judge us based on what I’ve shared with you. And if you say Andrea might be too young for me, I am not threatened by his age, he in fact makes me feel like a baby. There’s  a lot to say but the summary is, for the first time in my life, I’m in love with someone who treats me right, loves my body the way it is and never holds back. I like to believe I’ve found my soulmate, though unfortunate after marriage. 

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soulmate after marriage

Many would point fingers at me, and ask why I decided to cheat on my husband, and even conclude that the best approach would have been to communicate with my husband on how I want to be loved.  You see,  as much as love is teachable, it’s not teachable too. The heart would always gravitate in the direction it wants to. What my husband has given me so far, is his best understanding of how he sees love. It’s not enough for me, and it’ll be further unfair for me to keep overreaching. Communication is beautiful, but we must learn to walk away when the people we hope to hear us cannot comprehend. Even in marriage too. 

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Now my big question… I mentioned earlier that people only encourage walking away from marriage when one’s partner has brutally wronged them. In this case, they mean domestic violence. Based on my experience, I’ll say it’s wrong to have that as the only qualifier. Should I remain married to a person who has brutally wronged me by not loving me in the way that I want to?  Both singles and married readers, I need your honest opinion. I know some married folks go through this too, please share your experience with me in the comment section👇👇.