On some days, I feel like a 4-year-old. Other days, I feel like a 19-year-old and most of the time, I feel 21. I ask myself why the age factor is so important, why is it used to measure success in life? Do you get comments like “oh wow, you are so young” or “how do you think like a 30-year-old?” How about the most annoying comments like “you look 10?” or “You are only 21, why are you behaving like an old woman already?”.
Why is it that when you are doing something big or not living up to the ‘standards’, the next thing people are concerned about is how old you really are? As we age, the ‘age syndrome’ begets more validity than our individuality. Starting from within the family to the school system down to making friends, achievements, seeking a job, and the likes…“How Old Are You?” always rings a familiar bell.
Read: 5 Reasons Not to Fear Getting Older
The honest truth is most times, I avoid telling my age or worse off including it while filling a document because there’s this bugging feeling that I do not merit the age. Every time I’m about to disclose my age, I have to do a mini-battle with my inner man… “Why don’t you lie? At least keep it three years below, that compliments your achievement”... and there I am, hesitant to disclose it. I get really pissed when people say to me “you are this age and you have achieved this” or “Wow! I can’t believe at this age you’ve never *****, when do you intend to do it?”
The school system among other units is the least to make you feel cool about your age. Imagine a twelve-year-old girl who finds herself caught in a slow educational process due to psychological incapacity or change of environment, and is made to start afresh in a new school. That alone is depressing. She gets into school and her classmates cannot phantom why someone bigger in size shares the same learning space with them. Culture shock hits! Trust the kids, name-calling like ‘mama’, ‘biggie’, ‘giant’, and various forms of degrading names becomes her new name. If she grows up to the university level and decides to conceal her age, would you blame her?
Read: Birthday Blues? Oh, Christ! I Hate Birthdays
Sadly, there are a lot of depressed individuals out there today who feel disappointed in themselves for not ticking all the items on their list before they come to a certain age. Well, I’ve been there and sometimes still find myself stuck there and the option is to think “Oh God, I’m such a failure”.
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I read a book some time ago and in that book were thirty things you should achieve in life before you turn 30. Does it mean that if I fail to achieve these things before I turn 30, I have failed as an individual? These ‘standards’ have put undue pressure on us to say the very least.
There’s so much societal pressure on individuals when they begin to mirror age 20-30. You graduate from school and now you are in the race of who will make it big first and when you attend parties or get-togethers or even your school’s reunion and see your mates talking about what they have achieved and there you are thinking “what am I doing with my life?”
Read: Success! Will You Forgive You?
It is hard to find an individual really proud of their age. Only those who have achieved a deafening feat go about flaunting their age effortlessly. There’s something about achieving so much in just a little age span. It’s a somewhat supernatural feeling; it makes a person feel like they are not of this world. Demigods. Everybody loves to feel that way but unfortunately, not everyone will. Why do you think your favorite celebrities hide their age? Why do you think the media will be more obsessed with carrying the story of a 16-years-old girl who climbed Mount Everest than a thirty-year-old who did?
I wish we knew enough to know that we are all different and it’s important to move at our individual pace. It shouldn’t matter if your mates are doing way better than you are, the only thing to not be proud of is laziness but if you are hardworking, you do your job and get your pay, there should be no need to worry about the age factor right? I wish it was as easy as I have written.
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Are you also caught in hiding your real age? Do you sometimes wish you were three years younger? Oh, wait a sec. I know some people who wish they were older, are you one of them? Let’s discuss the ‘Age factor’ and the way forward.
Honestly I don’t really care what people say about my age, when you ask I will tell you my age straight. But what pisses me off is when you tell them, they say “Why are you lying” “You can’t be that old” “You can’t be more than 21” “Tell me your real age jor” “Show me your certificate”, I mean what exactly is their problem 🤷♀️ Why are you helping me to argue my age. My age is my age, stop the trashy act 🚶🏻♀️🚶🏻♀️
Exactly! This is also a problem. You are truthful and someone who feels so confident that you are not the age you say puts it directly to your face that you are lying.
It makes it better to lie then.🥺
Welcome on board Oluwatoke, I hope you drop by often 🤗🎈
This “age factor” is really eating us deep especially as blacks, you Just sometimes have to fake your age to keep up in relationships, getting a job and so on…
You wrote about life after school especially during reunions…. That shit could make you fake certain things just to keep up with your mates.
This could even lead to depression or something worse.
I pray we all get to come out of this mess soonest and be proud of our real age at least for once in life.
Amen. If only we knew enough to trust that there’s more to the ‘age syndrome’. I also hope that those who are fond of age shaming become better informed after reading this. Thank you Silas 👌
I think it’s good for one to really tell their real age..it shows maturity and it also shows that you’re real.. because so many fake people are out there.
I agree with you that it depicts maturity but sometimes our insecurities overrides it.
Welcome Chukwuka, I look forward to more of your Mutterings … cheers 🥂🥂
I can’t count how many times I’ve heard things like ‘ you act too matured for your age’ or it’s a lie that can’t be your age! 🙄🙄
The worst is when I tell someone my real age, they start sizing me up, trying to re-evaluate the respect they’ve given me all these while. Mtcheww.
This age matter no be here, at the end of the day don’t let anything or anyone put you under unnecessary pressure all in the name of meeting up to ‘society’s standard’.
You see this ‘age’ and ‘respect’ yeah, a lot of people find it difficult to reconcile. Especially in the work place.
I’m laughing hard right now! And that’s coz this speaks to me… not in the regular way though, but it does. Honestly Ehn, me I care a lot about what people think about my age o…I prefer to be perceived older than younger. I worry about celebrities who flaunts their age like it’s an advert on a billboard… I be like ‘ I know I ll be someone famous in the nearest future, I don’t think I would wanna flaunt my age like this. If anything it will be far different from my real age’. Lol… definitely higher and not… Read more »
When I see celebrities flaunt their age, I’m bemused. More like “I am not proud of my age why are these ones so proud?”. It hits even more when you realise the celebrity is the same age as you.🙄 I comfort myself by screaming “liar” in my mind. How are we the same age and you have achieved all these? Lol this is me slightly hating.🥺 I have never wished I was older and thank God I am that petite to the extent that guessing my age feels more of an insult than a compliment. I look ten years younger… Read more »
Most people think am lying each time i tell them my age while some say i dont act my age at all. Does age tell how one should behave?
In a way, Yes. Exposure can actually make one act more ‘mature’ than they actually are.
I have a little sister who’ll soon be 17, at 13, when she speaks – you’ll be gobsmacked. She’d counsel my mum sometimes and you can’t help but wonder how a girl this young can process such thoughts.
Thank you for clarifying this. 👌
This age thing is really a THING especially when it has to do with measuring the success you OUGHT TO to have achieved. I don’t really care much about the respect as anyone who chooses to disrespect me ’cause of my age is mentally ill. I’ve often heard things like “You think like an elderly man” and I’m starting to take it as a compliment. Not long ago, I was almost knee deep into depression if that’s what it is ’cause I was worried about where I am and where I think I’m supposed to be at this point in… Read more »
Your story is so relatable. Depression has a way of setting in immediately I begin to analyse my age and compare it to my achievements. And like you I really wish I wouldn’t dwell so much on it, but there I go sinking even deeper into depression.🥺
We can only try to look on the bright side, do our possible best while distracting ourselves once in a while.
I do believe that the reasons people hide their ages are enormous but none of those reasons is enough for me to hide my age. The truth is, I do care about the reality and sincerity of purpose. Oh, I didn’t tell you that I believe in predestination and I am conscious of it. Just think about it! Why was I born the day, week, month and year that I was born? I’m certain these are significant to my purpose and essence on this planet, then nothing should and will make me hide that beautiful day, week, month and year… Read more »
Wow! This feels just enough. Henceforth I will make it a conscious effort to be proud of my reality. Thank you King 🎈
🤣🤣 like why do people do this when they know deep down they aging, cos I wish you do this age hiding and ur age stops moving, waits for u to achieve whatever it is before it continues reading. At the end I think the burden society, family, friends, spouse etc place on some people cause them to hide and sometimes not be proud of their age. SAD!!! Your age does not in anyway account for your achievements forget the world just LIVE right, drink plenty water, work hard, acknowledge where you are, be prayful etc.
😂😂😂 exactly! No matter what you do, you are ageing. No lies can save you. I wish we knew enough not to worry about society 🥺
From this article, i think its not bad worry about your age or lie about it either. Some people say “age is just a number”. Its so wrong. Age matters in our world today. People lie about their age because they want to get that dream job they have been applying for years, they dont want to retire early, they want to have a shot at young pretty ladies. Our age affects our brain in a way. Age works along with experience on the other hand. So in my own opinion, i think its not so bad if one lies… Read more »
“AGE BENDING”…This is as sincere as SINCERE can be 👌👌
Thank you Pandora, also welcome on board, I look forward to more of your comments here 😁
For real,this age thing is somehow and yes age is just a number but some have to lie just to get their dream job or just to get their way through somethings in life and well I don’t really blame them, that’s just tge effect of neocolonialism..because the age bracket we use to dictate what people should be or not be is what “they” left for us to feed on..like damn we really need to stop the “you look bigger than your age”, “you at older than this”, ” I was expecting more with this age” like my dear maturity… Read more »
I bet it won’t stop.
The most painful is “I was expecting more with this age” likeeeeeee cant I be a baby sometimes?🥺
Thank you Rachael. You are new here and I like you already 😁… I look forward to more comments from you. Cheers 🥂🥂
I used be so confident when it comes to telling people my age.
I would always ask people “why do you even hide your age” until this year when I clocked 25, I started to feel this type of way
I would refuse to tell anyone my age, but then again I thought of it, what’s the use hiding my age? What difference does it make?
Rn even if i tell anyone my age they still think I am adding to my age, they never believe I am up2 my current age.
😂😂😂 there’s something about clocking 25, you just begin to feel too old already 😂😂😂
No need hiding it actually because you’re still ageing but thankfully small body is bae😁
I am not easily moved by what most people have achieved and at what age they did cause I believe everyone is different and so I don’t compare myself with others
Then you are at a good place. I pray you maintain the spirit forever. Thank you Victor, also welcome on board 💥💥
we make mountain out of nothing in this country alot. Yes I don’t announce my age but if you ask me I’ll tell you straight up. Someone who values you, respects you…. And our youths put alot of pressure on themselves, you haven’t achieved all you expected at 29… And so what? You’re not lazy are you? Keep striving and forget about what your mates are doing or have done. This life nah personal race.
Hmmmm “SOMEONE WHO VALUES YOU RESPECTS YOU”… this solves it.
Thank you Ezeugo🎈
Hello, good thing you said keep striving. will you lie about your age in order to get somethong you really really want?
Lets say chevron is employing; full time staff. And the pay is between 500-800k per month. Luckily, you have someone inside who wants yo help and you have a 90% chance of getting the job. You have submitted your credentials. Now the age requirement is 23-28. And You are 30.
Well… It has been there since Genesis. There is time for everything. 😊 a time to be this and a time to be that. So don’t get mad when people say, you are this age and you have done this or have not done that. It’s in our inclination to be aware of time. That’s why you always here people say “no time”. But people that don’t shy away from their real age are successful people. Whenever you ask them, they are telling like tekashi😄. Why? .. Because they are lucky to utilize their time very well. Their progress or… Read more »
Amen ooo 😂😂😂 well said Slimphiz
Nice article and all the comments reflect mine too. Thanks
You are welcome 😄😄
This article resonated perfectly with me on how I’ve always felt about the “age” topic. I happen to be in the category of those who look younger for their age. Most people barely believe me anytime I tell them my actual age. Even some of my work colleagues never knew i wasn’t exactly age mates with them until they found out my real age. Though I don’t exactly feel disrespected whenever they do it. If anything it actually makes me feel younger and yes I’ve learnt to go with the flow of feeling years younger than I’m actually. So when… Read more »
Slice off? Is it sliced bread? 😂😂😂😂😂
It’s good you have mastered the art of not letting it get to you. You also sound like a jolly fellow too. Nice thinking Chuks 😁