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Forgiveness: Do you still feel Hurt?

Writer- Makana G. Nria
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2 min read

About forgivenessI know how to hold a grudge so when I have to forgive people it requires an extra effort.  I read somewhere that you know you have forgiven a person when you think about them and what they did and not feel hurt anymore. The truth is I still feel hurt even after saying “I forgive you“.

So to combat the spirit of unforgiveness, I started giving myself “proofs”. I will give my offenders anything they asked for. Go the extra mile for them, do things I didn’t even do before they offended me.

Forgiveness does not have to be once and for all. You can forgive and still be hurt.
One day the pain will fade but until then we keep forgiving and we keep loving.

The ‘proofs’ served as a response whenever the feeling of being hurt returned and the devil said I had not forgiven them. I always remind him of all that I did for them and tell him a person holding a grudge would not be that nice.

Read: How Seeking Forgiveness Can Be Exhausting

Forgiveness does not have to be once and for all. You can forgive and still be hurt. You’re human. But when you remember the event and feel hurt, you forgive again.

 forgiveness
You can forgive and still be hurt

You forgive today, tomorrow, next week, next month, next year…as often as it takes. One day the pain will fade but until then we keep forgiving and we keep loving.

How about you? Do you forgive once or it takes a while? What’s your mantra towards forgiveness?

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solchibuzor
solchibuzor
8 months ago

Forgiveness I think…is a gift. To some it comes very easy, they just decide to forgive you even if you asked for it or not, even if you show remorse or not. They do it for their own sanity, they just need to let go of the hurt, whether you’re on board or not. These ones I call champs with my both thumps raised up for their courage. To some others, you the offender, has to meet them halfway. You have to give a hint that you want to be forgiven. Then after you’ve been forgiven, you have to assist… Read more »

muttering minds
Admin
8 months ago
Reply to  solchibuzor

Wow! Like my pastor said some sundays ago, forgiveness does not guarantee a change in behaviour. Forgive because you want to, not because you expect change.

So are you still friends?🤔

Darius
Darius
8 months ago

I can forgive and I can also hold a grudge. It depends on the gravity of the offence committed.

Personally, I consider certain wrongdoings unforgivable. Backbiting, backstabbing, betrayal and ungratefulness are wrongs I can’t and won’t forgive.

muttering minds
Admin
8 months ago
Reply to  Darius

Betrayal tops the food chain for me. It’s a NO!

Obama
Obama
8 months ago

I forgive but I don’t forget. Like Darius said, some sins are unforgivable… Sometimes all that’s required to cleanse my memory of your sins is a pay back or even a simple remorseful apology.

muttering minds
Admin
8 months ago
Reply to  Obama

Pay back in what sense?

Obama
Obama
8 months ago

Let’s just say, I can be vengeful sometimes.

Darius
Darius
8 months ago
Reply to  Obama

I also have a vengeful streak.

Obama
Obama
8 months ago
Reply to  Darius

It is needed ooh!

At some point, People need to know risk involved in offending you.

That’s how I handled a lady’s misbehavior in ABSU, we still run things much later but she learnt her lesson not to mess with me.

muttering minds
Admin
8 months ago
Reply to  Obama

I see🤣

Blinkz
Blinkz
8 months ago

Lol it’s not always easy but as Christians you have to forgive inside life but there are some people that when you think of what they did to you you still feel like going to beat them up

muttering minds
Admin
8 months ago
Reply to  Blinkz

🤣🤣 you are right, if not for doctrines, we wouldn’t bother to forgive. Thank you and welcome on board😁

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