Before you kick off reading my story, I’ll need you to bear in mind that I don’t buy into this crap of a statement that “the church is for perfecting, not for perfect people”, for these nine worded bullocks only excels at being the leverage to commit sins with impunity. And for the ones who are quick to clench to the sermon of grace being in abundance, hence committing recurrent evils, I hope your waterloo is not far-fetched.
I love God and I know He loves me so much that there is no external judgment that can limit his love for me. I was born into a spiritual family. My Dad was our role model, he loved the things of God and also gave to the church. But as I grew, I began to witness the envy rooted in the church, members competing against each other and all these made my brain itch as I couldn’t reconcile the words of the bible compared to the actions of the people.
The Triggers Started To Play Dirty…
Then the rug was pulled off my feet when my pastor, a man who I held as a mentor and somewhat the people’s savior, handed my father over to the police for a case that just needed a few elders sitting to be resolved. My pastor’s son had a rift with my aunty and my dad had only returned from work to meet the mess but before he could say jack, the police were already in our house and bundled my dad and others to the station. Tell you what, after the police read the statement, they dismissed it immediately on grounds that it was an issue best settled at home. Why wasn’t the so-called man of God able to settle it? Why didn’t he let love lead as he usually preached?
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For months, my family stopped attending church services and took to worshipping at home to avoid further triggers. But you know how our mothers can be, always feeling the need to draw the home to God, so we moved to another church. The new church appeared quite stable because you know the thing about rolling with unfamiliar faces, you just do your shit and leave, this was our case.
Not long before I embarked on a personal study on the word of God and began to ask questions especially on these so-called miracles and revivals that seemed to be the most projected church attribute at the time. I got no answers because here in this part of the world “you don’t question the Holy Spirit”. With time, I realized that all the displays were maybe a little backed by God but for certain, had more psychological backing or should I say manipulation. Like people use quotes to justify bad behaviors, church leaders are guilty of this too, but their weapon is biblical quotes.
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For example, the bible says, “ye are the light of the world”, which means that you are the ones to lead the people in the knowledge of things in the world. But in churches, this bible verse is restricted to the church. Just a few churches appreciate it when one uses their gift/talent in the secular world, the rest expect you to use it for “only Jesus”, which is funny because even the same bible says “that the gift of a man will make way for him”. How do you limit one’s gift and not support them in their endeavor? For instance, in every service you see the talented pianist giving his best, not even a token to show appreciation despite the numerous offerings huh? And then it becomes a grave sin when he goes circular and starts getting paid what he’s worth? I’ve never seen a unit that turns a blind eye to empowerment as much as the church does, at this point, even the government has a better profile. And when someone dies in cases like depression and all, nobody tries to look back at what made it happen…the next day church continues. The event of suicide will even be used as either sermon or testimony.
Covid! A Revealer Of Secrets And A Blessing In Disguise
Early 2019, I became exhausted from church activities with news of rape, online fraud, and other unexplainable events no one will ever believe happened within the four walls of a church or were carried out by staunch members of it. Not to go into vivid details enough to warrant name callings, but it was that bad, victims were silenced and blackmailed by top church leaders to save face and uphold church name.
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Then, the rebel in me began to ask questions, “why?” and “how?”. I felt so much anger and pain mostly because God became a silent watcher and the ones he assigned to do so on his behalf ended up betraying us. The crazy part is that the prey is revered by all and sundry. No one dares talk ill of him, because there is one stupid member ready to give his life for him. Holiness became a facade, the church was a disguised cult ground.
Then came COVID-19, The revealer of secrets. For some reason, victims started to find their voice all thanks to social media. Could you imagine the pastor picking ladies in the choir one after the other, seducing them, and raping those who wouldn’t yield? And his wife has no remorse but chose to blackmail these ladies? It even led to a Facebook fracas, all I could say was “Alas! Jesus!”
Read: A Crispy Take on why I Became A Religion Non-conformist
The lockdown gave me the understanding that there is no need for us to put any man before God. We were at home, because of the virus. No church, no seeing the pastor (even tho, some still did in their neighborhood). We called on God’s help and he answered. The lockdown removed the dust from my eyes as I found a closer relationship with my creator, I was able to separate the reality of life from religion. How God even expects us to think like humans and not like morons. Pastors are like us, mere mortals, so no need making them feel like God, instead we should spread love and light among people.
The War Against Humanity…
I am against the war against humanity which is evident in churches. Christianity is supposed to help humans become better but the church only cares about milking members with numerous offerings and whatnot. They care less about members’ quality of life, but more interested in manipulating members into slavery whilst backing up with biblical bullocks. Is it too hard to see that the biblical days are far more different from this era? Why expect discipleship like that of the old? Can’t tell me anything, religion in this part of the world is strictly business.
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I’ve had my share of bad dealings with the church and I don’t want any more of it. If I look past the happenings around me and don’t move, I might be crushed by the moving train. Slow for you to ever think that these so-called pastors are non-partisan. They have friends everywhere; in the police, army, politics, and all. In a lawless country like Nigeria, you cannot fight them. They can take the life of man without thinking of God. And Someone advises waiting on Karma?! Till you die, Karma may never show up, then you begin to feel that God is partial. I put it to you that church war is worse than family war, a person will be on the side forming ‘Jesus baby’, unbeknownst to them the other person has gone diabolical.
I have not gone to church for a while, but I have never missed out on God’s unimaginable love. When church folks come at me with the “Do not forsake the gathering of the brethren” lines, I ask, what if I don’t want to gather with the brethren? Also, the spiritual growth usually emphasized is a continuous journey based on building one’s faith and faith they say comes by hearing, and hearing the word of God. So if I listen to sermons that help build my faith without going to church, I am okay I believe. Spiritual growth is not about being in one department or the other in church. If your pastor’s sermon is not enough to make you study the word of God and understand it for yourself, is it joining the ushering department or choir that helps you grow spiritually? I think not. Church departments are no different from social gatherings, they help you relate better with other members and if care is not taken, see finish ruins it.
Read: Christians, Was It A Miracle or By Force?
The journey of life is personal to every man. Man made these rules to control others. As humans, we are all gifted with the gifts of the Holy Spirit, just that we are too anxious and out of place to know.
If our hearts are filled with fewer worries, and as we ask, we wait, listen and meditate on God’s words and know how to apply them to our daily lives, we are good. Sometimes, the gathering of the brethren causes envy, strife, lies, even killings…unnecessary beef.
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Hey reader, like me, did you also stop attending church? I’d love to know your trigger. Why did you forsake the gathering of the brethren? And how have you felt since then? Much better or worse? If at some point you neglected the church and came back much later, I’d appreciate it if you could take us through that journey of discovery, perhaps it could help. Also to those who eventually turned atheist in the process, it’ll be pleasing to learn of your triggers too. To the church folks reading this, why is it always a cause for drags when someone says they no longer attend church?
Not in a bid to cause any strife, let’s just have this sincere conversation in the comment section😄👇.
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Sometimes we hear some folks say they haven’t been to church in a very long time. The decision is not one that happened overnight but as a result of certain triggers. We briefly had this conversation on Telegram and I felt it’ll be fair to bring it to the website. Like the writer has narrated her ordeal, I’ll like to know why you fall in either of these categories; Stopped attending church, became an atheist, or still attend the church despite all odds. Shall we? Please share your own personal experience and reservation in the comment section. 😄 Also please,… Read more »
I have seen a bit of church politics and drama. Sometimes, most times, some religious leaders(church leaders) go astray. Cases of rape or molestation is something that leaves me wondering if they were actually living the Jesus life. It’s crazy and often weakens the soul to see those you look upto do these things. I’ve once been away from church, but I came back. Haven’t gone back to a department yet but, soon hopefully. I don’t judge people who stay away from church, find God for yourself, know Him personally, and as the Spirit leads, find a good gathering of… Read more »
Thank you!! Nothing as betraying as seeing someone or a group you hold dearly do things you never expected. It hurts.
I’ll really love if you could go into details on why you left the church and what made you come back. Perhaps it’ll inspire someone too. 😄
Okay. This is an interesting and sensitive topic. This is my point of view. As much as there are bad people in the world, they’ll definitely be bad people in the church. It doesn’t mean that everyone in the church is bad or Christianity is fake. We have bad workers and bosses everywhere but we don’t stop going to work or set up businesses because we have bad bosses or customers. We should also understand that where there’s good, the devil tries to ruin it by creating stumbling blocks and all that. Most people that trigger others are insecure, they… Read more »
Hmmmm… I’m not sure comparing work or business to this does absolute justice. Maybe partly. When a person has an option to give up, wouldn’t they? Compared to the church, work and school sometimes leaves one with no choice than to stick. We have cases where people still give up on these things to protect their mental health. It’s like preaching to a person to stay and fix an unhealthy relationship when they have the option to walk away and be by themselves or find another person to love. Trust me, people especially devotees who stop attending the church must… Read more »
It’s been a while I was on here. I don’t have anything to say, but it feels good making the First comment for the first time. I’ll be in the comments.
PAINNNN!! 😄😄, long time really. Trust you’ve been well. Yeah yeah, please be in the comments, could trigger a thought or more😉.
Dear reader I can relate,I’ve felt betrayed severally by certain individuals within the church but i came to the conclusion that it has more to do with man’s general manipulative attitude,man is the worm,he eats up his society,his government,his family and his church too. It’s him everywhere,in the failed government system we complain about he’s there,in the abusive family he’s there,in the selfish and wicked society he’s present that’s why in the fellowship of the brethren he’s there as well causing trouble. That’s not to negate the fact that you can also meet pretty amazing people in church too but… Read more »
I love these lines more; “they were already amazing people so the word of God just built on what was pre existing or rather they were willing to learn and be taught so that made it easy for them to be molded into better people.” The whole talk of ” Serving God cleanses a man” is one many misunderstanding. God cannot completely cleanse a man except he be willing and it’s a process too. A lot of us struggle with bad behaviors, only a few make conscious attempt to let go. Unlike you, the writer has chosen to operate at… Read more »
“God cannot completely cleanse a man except he be willing.” Well, was that the case of Saul turned Paul?
This is the truth!
Deep sigh. The writer has obviously gone through a lot with the church since childhood and although the post is lengthy, it’s still obvious she held back on some things. So why did I stop attending church? No bad thing happened to me, I just grew up and set my own standards. Not like I have stopped self, I don’t make it a do or die affair. Per personal relationship with God, truthfully I don’t have that either, wish I did but it is what it is. Tbh, lack of time is the factor, I barely pray and when I… Read more »
Yeah yeah, writer did go through a lot actually. It was a tough nut getting this much information cause of the emotions attached. I figure for you, lots of other activities just became a priority. Similar with me too, I am not frequent and stopped feeling bad about it. My dear, personal relationship with God is not beans o, sometimes you really can’t discern what the big man wants. How do you know your prayers don’t make sense? You see like we all have different personalities, and relate with people differently, that’s the same way God sees us. A lot… Read more »
You’re right admin, there seems to be a subconcious prayer standard that affects most of us.
I’ll read the links this weekend. Thanks
You’re welcome 🤗
My problems with the church started with my mums sister when she left our church and our pastor was talking about how ungrateful she was when It was our Church God that blessed her I was quite young and didn’t really understand my mums anger until my mum was embarrassed in front of the church for issues she had no control over. It was a messy situation. I kept thinking of why it was like this. Couldn’t the church behave like Jesus and be amicable. Then student church at school where hypocrisy was its highest. I decided to stop going… Read more »
Lowkey like some toxic relationships, the church leaders also move with this “after all I’ve done for you” mentality. So many sneaky men of God who feel entitled to your blessings because they supposedly joined their faith in prayers with you. My brother also had the same experience, got a job after praying for a while with his pastor on the matter and then for some reason, the pastor always felt entitled to his salary. This excluding thithes o, my brother was literally feeding his family too. I’ve also heard preaching from a man of God come from a place… Read more »
And they don’t hide the entitlement act… Hear him… @nobody should call the pastor o… Pride in all its forms
Being queer and my personal relationship with God is different but the church would not accept me so why bother sef?
Lol, have you openly declared?
I stopped going to church since I started asking questions….. First I started with asking biblical questions because I wanted to know what the pastors really know and how God spoke to them… Until I found out it wasn’t really God and was just their selfish goal from the Christian organization in order to control then I started to seek out other information I started to understand the root of Christianity and other Abrahamic God and found out all is just man made… That’s when I drew my curtain and started to fuel my curiosity…. Since then I’ve never been… Read more »
Hmmmmmmm… all man made? 😂😂😂 You’re an atheist I get, I would have loved you threw more light on this though. Especially on some of these findings that made you conclude its all man made.
They just so much and they are right under our nose for us to see… Firstly, all rules, regulations and laws in all kinds Religious practice specifically, the Abrahamic God was created by Man or its man made, to control the affairs of its people.. Let’s not forget the religion was among the foundation of most political systems we practice now. The only difference is Religion rules and controls with Fear of a (Supreme God) where it’s people are not allowed to ask Questions all they do is just follow… While their leaders who are representative of the Supreme wallow… Read more »
Hmmmm… this one is quite loud. Thank you for buttressing 🤧
Seriously, i will like that you share these findings with us. Its tiring!
Very very true these days the main priorities of alot of churches are misguided
Lol I’m tagged stubborn in my house because I make decisions that counter series of orders. And one of the orders is “nobody stays back while others are in church” and you already know why…😂😂😂 pastor pikin wahala.
…so I stopped going to church because of gossips, unnecessary competition among different parents that trends down to their children.
Lol, omo wahala be like church project (e no dey ever finish).
😂😂😂😂😂 the last line. I swear, especially Catholic Churches, there is always one project or the other. Now check out harvest thanksgiving, different tags of offering including for football clubs 😂😂😂😂.
I can only imagine what it feels like to be a Pastor’s kid. Dear future hubby, I hope you know being a pastor is an expensive joke yo! 😂😂😂
This competition part ehn… The pressure that comes with it… When will people have time to focus on their purpose for life.
The “people” makes the “church” growing up my mum was never someone who was so into this whole church church pastor pastor thing, she taught us to love God and not the church or the pastor, she made us realize that pastors and other elders in church can really be manipulative and selfish. I’ve never been a person who Goes all out to please a church or a pastor, I go there to worship God and that’s that. i have heard so much stories on how churches have done so much to people and for me it all boils down… Read more »
Your comment is novel because hardly will you see someone from our parents generation teach these hidden truth about the church to their kids. Our parents are notable for breaking their backs for so called pastors and church leaders, kudos to your mum. It’ll be easier for your kids too.
This is what our generation should work on so the chain can stop. Else, our children will suffer more.
A flat mate of mine gisted me about how Christ embassy scared her, she said they made her sew seed to extent that she even sewed her shoes one Sunday and went home without shoes. While she was gisting me I kept on wondering what level of manipulation would make someone drop her shoes, asin how? She said something about paying for partnership and after the end of the year they give credit to person who paid highest and I was there like “in the house of God” who does that? Now this lady no longer goes to church cause… Read more »
Lmao!! Been there done that, could still do so but never again under compulsion.
I’m still yet to wrap my head around the reason why there is usually a special recognition for the highest givers in the church. Its a different thing to have musical awards, but giving awards?? Whew!! Maybe someone with a better understanding should explain, not guaranteed that whatever explanation Will make sense to me though🤧.
I really hate how the church preaches unison but when trouble calls, no help comes. Just prayer! 🤨
This thing ehn. I remember a church member then who was very rich and was always called at every church occasions. She and her family were the golden ones until things turned around for them. It was sad to see the church replace her immediately. Gossips started going around about her daughters. How they were runs girls and shit. Girls I knew that they were honest and good. This family didn’t come to church for close to a year due to embarrassments and the gossips. My mum told me they came back recently but has been really quiet. They was… Read more »
This part ehn…
What if the family had died of frustration and depression…? Service continues…
Mehn! These things!
Some people might find it hard to understand these stories because, they are part of those who enjoy the proceedings of the church. Some even have their future prepared for them because they will be the ones to take over from their fathers.
While there are others who see these MOGs as their mentors and role models so it will be hard to rebel against them.
It is only he who wears the shoes, that knows where it hurts.
I stopped attending church before because I was hurt and depressed. Church is religion, and religion seeks to explain God. At first, we think the church is perfect, because that’s what we were thought to think. Then we rebel and ask questions. Then we oppose the church. Then we are tolerant of the church. Then we separate religion from spirituality. The sweetest way to enjoy God through the church this 2021? Listen online and avoid the social congregation. Attend the social congregation, but don’t join a department. Have like three parishes that you worship, no loyalty to any one. Ehn… Read more »
😂😂😂😂😂 hilarious yet makes absolute sense. Thank you
Ok. I love this write up. Just need to correct few things: 1. Nothing’s changed since the biblical times; remember it was the priests (Pharisees and their hench men) that were always setting traps for Jesus. Till they succeeded in crucifixion, let that sink in 2. The serpent told Eve, you eat of the fruit, you will be as wise as God. He didn’t lie persay 😂. Even during slavery, the white people used the bible to back their actions even creating another bible called the slave bible, where texts asking them to serve was the main message. So is… Read more »
Your pointers are 🔥 🔥. It’s so refreshing to read 😁. To add to number 7 yeah, being a pastor should not be limited to spirituality, there are other teachings on leadership as well as other areas that makes room for wisdom. Most of these men of God didn’t attend theological school but leverage on “I was called by God” lmao. Dears, we are not disputing that you were called, just be a well-rounded individual.
Thank you for this!!😁
😂 😂 some flash themselves o save the number as God
😂😂😂😂 better flashing no be here
Some flash themselves o. Come save the number as God🤣
I beg to disagree here! The pastor is not meant to be responsible for any other thing than the spiritual, that is the sole duty of his office…It is when a pastor start doing things outside his office that he begins to feel entitle!
And mind you, there is no how he will be effective and efficient in his office that, he won’t be a role model.
And going to theology school isn’t a must.
Okay!! Your opinion afterall!!
I think you need to listen to one of Chris Delvan’s (aka Gwamna) song that also has his messages, either ‘Obedience to Christ’ or ‘Holy’. He talked about the role & services that is attached to being called a ‘pastor’
Your belief that man can exist outside politics especially when humans are political animals is the wrong view. Racism fought by Martin Luther was a humanitarian fight but did you not see the political implications and strategies? Desmond Tutu helped Mandela in fight on apartheid. I’m even going too far, who anointed and advised Saul? There are and have always been 2 pillars of power in the society. The Crown and The Church. Your bible is filled with men of God advising kings and you say that pastors should have nothing to do with politics but somehow expect killers, thieves… Read more »
Also about the theology school. Jesus before his ministry was forgotten by his parents, they returned to find him discussing with priests. The bible tells us a lot of things but we do not listen. Jesus was the son of God yes, but he read. He was the word, but he studied and discussed with elders. This should let you know that wisdom comes from learning. Yes the bible is spiritual but it is backed by certain practical laws; sew and you will reap, seek and you will find. Study to show thyself approved unto God, a workman who needeth… Read more »
Wow! This is massive! Thanks for the words… I have read the Book of Enoch too. So sad how they wrote the Bible the way it was written. Thank you.
Any link for the book of Enoch?
Drop your email. Before i share, i feel i should drop disclaimer: because that book had me rerepenting like 10 times each day i read. Are you sure you want to read??
Already downloaded. In Page 1 already.
Fast fingers lol
🤣 🤣 😂 no joy. I love it
I’ll be honest. The bible as it is is good. There are some discussions many are not developed mentally and spiritually, to handle. See the evolution and creation topic for example…. it’s till you read the verse where God says a day to me is like a thousand to man it can make more sense, but even before then confusion can arise and if there’s no one to guide you. You spiral down the path of facts and knowledge which is dangerous cause knowledge can also destroy. See Adam and Eve The fact is, spirituality is very deep and the… Read more »
Most people on this post have complained bitterly about the church, while doing so, they’ve condemned the church…yet, they still claim to be having a good personal relationship with God, that’s impossible!!! You can’t have a good relationship with God, and still condemn the church! Plus, you can’t be a student of the Bible and still refuse to be an active member of the church, not to talk of you not attending church at all! Otherwise, you will differentiate between the church and individual members. The church is both individual Christians and the body of Christ (the gathering of the… Read more »
Hmmmm Dos Dos🤗, should I say I expected this from you? Lol. I really don’t buy the idea that it is impossible not to have a personal relationship with God because a person doesn’t go to church though. It’s very likely you consider online church as crap then.
Perhaps you can throw more light.
Lols, Uju…you can bank on me defending the church always! Online church is not church! Church is a matter of physical gathering! Online service has never worked for me, I will rather gather with 5 believers, than do online service. Now, it is important to know that, the idea of church is God’s! Gathering of the saints edifice not just worshippers, but also glorifies the Father. The church is also called Mount Zion, looking through the Bible to see the prophecies about Zion in the end time! Jesus is the Good Shepherd, a shepherd leads a flock. How can you… Read more »
Online church is not church?? Lmao 😂😂😂😂
Sure you’re also against digital bible. E remain to carry Moses scroll dey waka😂😂.
Meanwhile ever heard the sentence “the church is not a place but the people”?
Your opinion though. Thank you 🤗
I use digital Bible, I don’t have a paper Bible sef.
One of the main purposes of church is physical gathering! This is not opinion, this Scriptures! Infact, it is the gathering that is called church.
The church is multi faceted! There is the angle,which see church as individual members, there is also the building, there is also the body of Christ and there is the gathering!
The church started in the midst of persecution…the number of people killed didn’t stop the people from gathering.
And that era and this is the same yeah?
Uju! Of course not…
I wrote that to say how important gathering is in the Christian faith! Nothing can subtotle gathering in the faith…it’s all there in the scriptures!
Alright that fine. Dos Dos 🤗
Nah! This is a big falter,online church is in everyway church as physical church is. So if i find myself in an area with no single Christian place of worship and I have the option to worship online,i should do so because it is not church? Or if I’m so sick and I can’t go out i shouldn’t join online church services? You should probably tell the churches that broadcast services online to stop because you think online church is not church. If i may ask, during the lockdown how did you worship?
I like the biblical quotes, easy to spell out.
Forgive 70 times 7, obviously yes… But i am sure humans don’t go for memory scanning to remove and forget the experiences they have had. Also, its sad the you don’t mind if the member enters into frustration and depression, and maybe commit suicide in the process…we must sha attend church.
You actually think that moving from one church is as easy as changing clothes.
No need making the writer look terrible by expressing this story.
Salvation is personal! Let judgement come and i face the music myself.
My intention was not to make the writer feel bad or ridicule her experiences…If my comment seems that way, I apologise for that!
However, I will like to point out that, changing church is better than not going to church at all…”upon mount Zion, there shall healing and blessings”, God promises to give all round healing to when we gather!
Forgiveness doesn’t have to come with forgetfulness! We will all offend people, directly or indirectly; intentionally or unintentionally…
You do realize the church is you & I?
Also,no matter which church you go to, you’ll definitely find these same ‘weeds’ which is why it is best to decide for yourself what you want.
Its not condemning the church rather it’s condemning the actions of some factions in the church and also, if the way you’ve explained here is how God is handling the world, i hope you know the world would have been wiped out by now, cause, like you said, if you don’t like the church, separate yourself from everything that concerns christianity.
Your point of view is very skewed because what you are essentially implying is that we should turn a blind eye to a church that is purposely inflicting pain on its members because we cannot be critical of the church. WRONG. Jesus himself was extremely critical of the church and went as far as flogging the priests and people who defied the temple. Also, if the church is the body of christ, will you allow your arm or leg to necrose and do nothing? Eventually, the entire body will decay. Reevaluate yourself.
I’m only responsible for what I wrote not what you are implying! Cos, what I pen down didn’t implied that at all.
After Jesus flogged those selling and buying in the temple, and condemned the hypocrisy of the temple leaders then…did He ever stop going to worship there or told anyone to stop?
Chichi…try dey calm down and understand things.
I love the point the writer made about appreciating the instrumentalist, although one might claim it’s in service to God, a little token/appreciation goes a long way… I’ve also had my share of church drama, I enjoy worshipping in churches with smaller congregation cos I feel there’s lesser drama and unity, but not this time around. On a very good day, I woke up to realize that I’ve been deleted from the church group chat and I got to find out it was because I’ve been absent for some Sundays 😂😂. It was weird because the pastor who removed me… Read more »
😂😂😂😂, the smaller the better indeed. You self you’re rude, pastor is looking for how to grow his members and you had the guts to toil with his feelings by being perpetually absent 😂😂😂
Seem like you missed the memo, one of our beloved in the comments just openly declared that online services do not count. You better amend your ways 😂😂😂😂
So how did he survive when everywhere was locked down? Mtcheww. When Sunday reach, he should come and drag me out of my bedroom
😂😂😂😂😂 he sure will
There were small gatherings of different kind 😁
😆 😆 😆 😆 😆
😂😂 Omo delete from the body of Christ. That’s not very Christ-like🤣🤣
😂😂😂😂 you say??
Lol. Them delete am from group na
Feels good to be back here.
About church matters, I’ll rather be quiet and be in comments. Cos if I begin to narrate my experiences in summary, it’ll be more lengthy than the story that brought us here.
I just came here to give knocks. God help your heads 😅
😂😂😂😂😂 welcome Jules, knock as you please.
The writer is obviously narrating from a pentecostal background (orthodox churches get their own winch sha 😅). Religion has always been a mass control mechanism, even though it provides some form of succor to the hopeless/downtrodden of society (in exchange for their rational/independent thinking and, atimes, rights). Little surprise how religious leaders wield so much power over their followers. (I’m tempted to ventilate about my ‘issues’ with religion/church but, nah, not today 😅.) My church attendance dropped considerably ever since I got posted to a southwestern state for NYSC in 2018. Was happy to have ‘escaped’ having to be compelled… Read more »
All of you that attend church due to the influence of EVE, chineke is watching all of you 😂😂😂
Lowkey, like you I regretted forming radical for Jesus in campus o. I wish I did more of flexing or balanced both but it was majorly from lectures to church for me ooouch!😂😂😂
Sure your parents have no idea what you’ve become lol 😂😂😂… May God lead you back to under their roof for small whooping lol
Lmao, make he de watch na (and try to show up just once kwanu☝🏽😒).
Lol, dem de call us ‘triangular students’ that time (lecture, hostel, and church)🤦🏻♂️.
Well, I’ve not had (urgent and important) cause to travel home yet this year, maybe until December. Dad has even accused me of turning into an atheist. Hard for many African parents to come to terms with the fact that their children are NOT an extension of themselves, but INDIVIDUALS who can have totally different sociopolitical, religious and sexual views/orientations and interests/ambitions from theirs. So freaking hard for religious parents smh😒.
Lol, since they brought you to this world, then they own you fam 😂😂
Would you ever have the ‘atheist’ conversation with him?
I doubt it. It’s gonna be an argument not a conversation lol. And you can’t win such with dismissive, close-minded religious folks.
“We’ll see where this is going to lead you to” was the response I got when I tried before. Pain! 😭🤦🏻♂️😒
😂😂😂😂😂😂 condemnation straight up!! With hopes that one day you run home crying like the prodigal son lol
I’ve had my fair share of the whole church drama thingy, as per pastor pikin. The fact that the congregation expects you to be perfect is a trigger not to be perfect, imagine wearing a dress and the next thing you hear is ”Omo Pastor”. Going to church should be a happy moment, but as time passed I’m always caught in big thoughts about whether I should go to church or not. You know the Bible says do not forsake the gathering of the brethren, omo it has turn to forsake the gathering of hypocrites because that’s what this people… Read more »
😂😂😂😂 it must be tough to be a pastors kid, many expectations lol. Society should maintain the same energy they give to other professionals kids. You don’t see Doctors children getting pressured to always carry syring and test kits around now😂😂😂
I should do a piece specially for Pastor’s kids lol
I remember the first time I wore trousers out, they told me I was a disgrace to my dad, I’m like 🤷♀️ egbami how now.🥺🥺 The church is where we have a lot of evildoers hiding under ”the grace of God has appeared to all man”, they will do evil and tell you ’it’s about my relationship with God’. Then you will look like the antichrist in their midst. Wo I shake my head
😂😂😂😂 disgrace to your dad? Not even God 😂😂😂😂. Last last listen to church people at your own risk o
For 6 whole years I didn’t attend any type of church activities, not even on Sundays, Christmas or Easter. My whole family were serious Bible carrying Christians, but I just didn’t feel like I fitted in. So I stayed at home, and these were the years when the only online service was TBN, and we no get TV. When asked by mum what the matter was, I countered her by saying “your other two sons who attend church have girlfriends and I don’t, so what’s the use?”. She didn’t have an answer because church was “supposed to change people for… Read more »
Very beautiful story, I laughed too 😂😂😂😂. @your two sons have boyfriends 😂😂😂😂.
The part where you said “given their lives to Christ”, I agree. Or should we say most need to rededicate their lives to christ if that makes sense.
Thank you for sharing 😁
The best comment i’ve read here so far
This article here is everything. I tend to find solace in my personal communion with God than going to a church gathering. But then again, i always tell myself not to let the negative actions of the people who claim to be in Christ in the church affect me, so i always make effort to go to church. The one i’ve chosen not to involve myself in for along while is joining groups, the things i’ve seen both in my youth-filled group; between leaders & members and in major groups that make up the structure of the church in the… Read more »
You’re welcome Addy🤗. Like you too, I’ve been avoiding church groups Like a plague. Apart from all you mentioned, these so-called groups consume time with the leaders having a toxic sense of entitlement. Now imagine dealing with this and a 9 to 5. Omoooo!!! And the most irking aspect is that when you decide to leave, they begin to bombard you with scriptures to guilt trip you. Like I always advice folks, the same way one tenders their resignation letter for jobs without feeling any remorse should be the same way one ends volunteering/church groups. Volunteering is not a “Till… Read more »
Honestly! I remember when i used to go to yaba from okota for group meetings/rehearsals, these people were well aware i stay very far yet they would delay & delay and when i decide to up & leave, it becomes something else, i’d eventually be getting home around 11pm all the time. Even in school i was mixing classes & 6hr draining lab sessions with group meetings, i couldn’t continue, i had to stop. It was all too much.
Just imagine!! And your explanation will never make sense to them, it only translates to backsliding 😂😂
I haven’t been to church in so long and I cannot even describe the change in my mind. There is no going back for me now.
Hmmmm mind sharing what transpired?🤧
Hi, I’m new here so it is 100% refreshing to find a page that is on the pulse of what is happening in our beloved country. As to my conflict with the church, I would say that I am someone who has always been inquisitive. If you tell me that one plus one is two, I must confirm it for myself. So imagine my surprise as a kid when my pastor would preach something and I would go home and review it and it was wrong. Very wrong. So one day, I muster up the courage to go to him… Read more »
Awww Chichi, you’re welcome😄, between you’re my sister’s namesake lol, I had to chip it in🤭. It’s so unfortunate that despite how little you were, the Pastor had to reinforce his ego like he’s in a competition with a little kid smh. How about drawing you closer with love?! I don’t know why but our parents have some form of rare tolerance that can be embarrassing especially the religious ones. Mostly stemming from the fear of “what will people say?” Or the fear of the unknown, so they oblige to save face. I would have been triggered in your shoes… Read more »
First off, let me say your experience is valid and deeply personal and no one should try to diminish it. Many of us church folks have had our fair share of these things to lesser or greater extents. I’ll like to say something that’s fairly obvious even though we all tend to ignore it sometimes. Almost everything good can be employed for evil given chance…some deliberately, sometimes from place of oblivious ignorance. What I’m trying to say is, the human factor must be put in mind. Which is why sometimes in churches, people allow their human inadequacies overshadow whatever grace… Read more »
Thank you Wole, your response is uplifting. I like the part where you mentioned the “human factor”, we are first humans before anything else.
I’ll direct your reference to the writer🤗.
About 90-95% of churches these days are nothing but a mere SOCIAL GATHERING. Worshiping place which is supposed to be a sacred and holy place to intercede with to God has fast becoming an institution of fashion display and all sorts of immorality… As I am typing right now, I think it was in the year 2011 I attended church last, apart for follow follow during the festivity and occasions The Level of immorality in the church these days has exceed the one occurring in the shrines. The only different is that while that of shrines are diabolical and the… Read more »
Hmmmmm too much to stomach🥺. Thanks for sharing.