Once upon a time, I used to be a huge fan of long-distance relationship. At the time, I swear, I could beat anybody up that tried to argue with me about close proximity relationships being better than long-distance relationships.
I wish I had listened, I wish I didn’t have to wait to be a victim. But you see, experience is a professor and in the school of long-distance relationships, I’m a PhD holder. Prior to now, never have I had a close-range relationship, and yeah they were all good guys to an extent.
First, it was Lagos to Ogun, afterwards, Lagos to Port Harcourt, then Lagos to Abuja. Next was Lagos to Ghana, the one that got me tumbling was Lagos to the USA. My heart is well travelled so trust me when I say LDR is a scam. I’m really sure a lot will still argue this out, but then, that’s why we are Mutterers right?
Someone once said to me “long-distance relationships require more trust”, but I don’t agree. Cause if you’ll be honest with yourself, it takes a high level of trust to believe what you see than what you don’t. I can’t punish my emotions with having faith in a relationship I can’t have access to as often as I wish. Are you Jesus? Let my faith be for him alone cause I’ve never seen him and won’t till I go to heaven. That’s the only long-distance relationship I can deal with in my life.
Point is, if you and your partner don’t have a strong physical connection, the distance will mess you both up badly. But still, no matter how strong the connection is, the distance will still disconnect the connection. Take it from me. And sadly, this long-distance relationship has destroyed a lot of people. I was almost on that list.
A friend asked me, “Jules, imagine you’re dating someone from a distance based on past knowledge you have of the person, and then one day he comes back and you both get married, only for you to realise you barely know each other?”.
Dear Mutterers, love cannot solve what knowledge should solve. Communication cannot give you what physical knowledge can give, especially in this our present era. It’s a proven truth that a lot of people know the right things to say when sought after for advice, but lack the act when they’re faced with it.
Communication is key in every relationship, but you see, communication is not character. Communication helps keep the long-distance relationship busy, but you see character, it helps keep your peace of mind and sanity.
For the long-distance relationship diehard fans, are you aware that long-distance relationship sucks, especially when you don’t have money? Especially in this our country, long-distance relationships are as hard as our economy.
After all these I have said, if you feel you got the balls to carry on with that miles apart relationship, you have to consider these two factors:
- You both have to be very intelligent & super inventive.
- You both should be financially independent to a VERY large extent.
If you both lack these, please look for someone in your neighbourhood and date. You can thank me later.