There’s always that one thing we want but we will never get, maybe, just maybe when we take our minds off the wishful thinking, that’s when it will come. Not promising, but this has always been a consolation response to me whenever I complain to my friends about how slim I am and cannot wait to grow fat.
Bowled over? It’s not like I am too thin but then…all my life, I have longed to be a little thick at least especially on some strategic part of my body but my creator wouldn’t let me shine on that path. Since I became aware of myself I don’t think I have ever changed in looks or size. “Vampire”… “Uju you are perfect the way you are”…“You are so small and cute”…”I wish I had your body”… blah blah blah… You really do think that’s a compliment right? You wish! Well, maybe sometimes.
The mistake most people make is that they think every slim person loves the way they are and that every fat person curses the day they were born. Do you ever stop to think for a second that some slim people actually hate it when you emphasize their body weight? Well, I belong to that one per cent of the one per cent who hate it when you do. Don’t ask me when I would gain weight or why I haven’t added since we left high school. It is rude.
That was how the other day I ran into a mate from high school and the first thing she said was “Ah Doris! you haven’t changed, you are still small”. I had to morsel laugh for pretence sake but after she left I began analyzing her birdbrained approach. I concluded it was as rude as asking a married couple why they haven’t had any kids.
MY WEIGHT GAIN TRICK AND BACK TO SQUARE ZERO
Being slim can be very fine especially on tall people but if you are ‘slim and short’ like me, you will agree with me that beauty goes on vacation sometimes without seeking your permission. My body is like a chameleon only that it changes its weight instead of colour. Small stress and I deflate. One minute I am happy to have gained 2kg and the next minute I am 4kg down. How annoying? It’s like one step forward and a million miles backward.
Read: What Is Perception To You?
So I discovered a weight gain trick two years ago. I started going to the gym. Daily. The first time I stepped my feet at the gym, it felt as odd as a baby enrolling for a Master’s Degree. “Ah”…“What do you want to lose”…“Do you want to disappear?” So many discouraging remarks but I didn’t give up. Specifically, I told the gym instructor that I wanted to add, not lose weight, “build my shape”. I started building my muscles and strength and taking lots of protein shakes. Little or no aerobics, deadlifts, lunges, leg lifts, squatting, and more. Squatting was my favourite exercise because I wanted to be just as bad as sexy and guess what, it worked. I built my muscles so much that I gained 10kg in five months. From 50kg to 60kg; well-shaped and a little thick. It was like Christmas in June until I got a nine to five job that swept me off my joy.
The new weight and look became history. I felt sad and still is. Initially, I tried to keep up with the gym during weekends but it felt like gaining only to lose it the next minute. There was no point. Little stress and small omissions that should become part of life because of our drive to make ends meet are bad for me. Stress like jumping buses from Monday to Friday, skipping meals, working hard, going for holidays…etc. they all take a toll on my weight. Now I weigh 49kg!! And the most unfair part of all these is that I see people who do worse than I do, gaining weight effortlessly while I get thinner than thin. This life is so unbalanced. If riches cannot be equal, let weight be even at least.
Read: How to Gain Weight Fast and Safely
IT IS DEPRESSING
You think that every slim person has it happy right? Well, it’s not the same for me. How do you explain seeing a really gorgeous dress you can afford and you purchase it only for it to be falling off your shoulders? Or the seller subtly screams at your face saying “leave it, it won’t fit you”. Deep down, she knows you won’t bring out the beauty of the dress.
Read: Addiction Is Not As Straightforward As You Think
You also think every slim person got there by default right? “Oh, it’s her nature”… well, it’s not for some. Some people are sick and the more they take their medications, fat has no place to stay. Some slim persons like me cannot even explain their body type. Sometimes I undergo forced feeding yet, nothing to show for it. Just like losing weight is a struggle for some, gaining weight is a slice of tough meat for me.
Meeting a slim person does not give you the right to start measuring the size of their arm with your fingers. It’s not cute. Or the name callings like “lepa”, “Broom Stick”, “Thinny” etc. These are very ugly names and full-blown body shaming that we have remained oblivious to. Except someone tells you that they like some part of their body, it doesn’t give you the right to assume that it’s good for them and start making jokes. The fact that a lot of people want something doesn’t guarantee that those who have it are happy with it.
I’m GOING BACK!
Well! Well! Well! Maybe you are slim and you love you just the way you are, that’s cool. As for me, l love me and will love me even more with some more flesh.
I want to put on some healthy weight again. And since I discovered the trick that works best for me is the gym, I’m going back. COVID took the nine to five away so I decided to look on the bright side of things. I’m going back to building my muscles and this time my target is 70kg. I hope to get there before the year runs. Possible? We shall see… I’ll try to keep you posted
My weight is one of my biggest insecurities. Talking about it with you Mutterers brings a sense of relief. Do you mind sharing with me your insecurities too? or perhaps we are walking in the same shoes, I’ll like to hear… or better still you got some advice on how I can gain some weight without going to the gym?
I’ll be waiting in the comment section.
Doris, you’ve literally been speaking my mind lately. What?? I’ve been on apetite boosters for the past two months but it feels like it’s making me even thinner. The worst part is my parents always make reference to it every day like is a plague I brought upon myself. It’s not fair. Body shaming slim people is a thing!!!! and it needs to be dead!!!!! We don’t fancy being called skinny 😔😔😒
Ah! Your parents too 😒😒… seems like they belong to the same WhatsApp group as mine. I was gonna chip their role in this post but I decided to forgo it. My parents will emphasize on how chubby and healthy-looking my peers are but me 🤣🤣. Whose fault?😒
Me too, I have tried appetite boosters but unlike you, mine makes me sleep and it affects my day so I discontinued taking it.
And I am glad to always speak your mind Wana… 😆
🙁🙁🙁
I can relate
In as much as I put up the confidence when am out, am so not comfortable when someone walks up to me to remind me that I have put up more weight me.
Dear reminders of body size
We go lose weight and we go add again, just leave us the way you see us. The struggle no be here o
Like the irony of life. If only we can weigh the same but apparently we can’t. I wish people knew how insensitive it is to emphasize on someone’s weight.
Thank you Glory❣
Oh dear, you struggled to change my perspective about your kind of stature, which I referred to as gloried stature, but with this piece, you still couldn’t. What I understand about human bodies is they are all excellent in their respective ways. The glory of human bodies differs (you may have to learn about them); but the glory of “slim and short” is much more ahead of them all. But I respect your opinion, somebody most have unconsciously created negative narratives about “Slim and short” in you, ignorantly; but the simple truth is that you have the best kind of… Read more »
No King, this is solely a narrative about my struggle to gain weight. No one had to change my perspective; the heart wants what it wants. I am glad you mentioned that you love “thick and short”…that’s a goal for me. I have been there and I loved it but with my narrative you can tell that it went AWOL😒 Maybe if people knew enough not to emphasize people’s weight especially those around me, then I might not have written this. But I get them to an extent. This minute they are happy at my new look and the next… Read more »
However, I can tell you simple meal that certainly make you loom chubby and healthy with glowing skin; in camera😜
😁😁😁 why not spill the secret here, I’m sure someone else needs it too😆
Did she say 😭
Abegg tell me I so badly want to gain
😃😃😃 Doris! The lord is our strength.
I certainly will, when we see
Just what’s on my mind,I wake up everyday looking at my neck bones and it brings me to tears plus people out there constantly reminding me of my skinny ass😞😞😞 so unfair. Some people’s weight gain is effortless while some of us even with every consciousness and determination it still brings us back to our skinniness. I gain little and shed a lot,I mean wth
Hey Didi, good to hear from you. Seems like we wear same shoes that bite. The only way I can encourage you is to overlook the remarks and try to focus on every other thing that makes you beautiful.
Then again, I wish I can take this advice I just gave you 😒😒… like the lots will say “When the weight comes we will start running from it”…well I can’t wait.
Welcome Didi❣❣ and please promise not to cry again.
U just spoke my mind…my mum literally mourns when I lose weight and whoops with joy when I add some as if she just won a lottery…she is obsessed with weight adding,she is fat,yet she wants to b fatter….this has made me insecure about my weight since I was young I have always wished I was a little bit taller,I thought I wouldn’t bother abt my slimness if I was tall,but I was cheated with height too,I’m 5’3,and I bemoan that fact everyday…I look way younger than my actual age,I am 25 and I’ve always bin mistaken for a 17… Read more »
Hi Tiwatope, So you also get that age mix up too… some will even argue that I am 12-years-old. I have been wanting to go on low-cut but my friends advised me not to try it that I will look like a little boy 🤣🤣🤣…not even a girl! So many secrets to gain fat, but it doesn’t work for me. Have you been advised to drink enough water too? 🤣🤣🤣 You see, the thing about us looking young in our old age might just be a packaged scam for some of us. There’s a way someone looks thin and pale,… Read more »
I get the age mix up every time and its absolutely annoying…imagine me calling someone who I didn’t know I was older than for like 7 years aunty
I’ve bin told to drink plenty of water too…but it doesn’t work
I do believe looking young in our old age is true…I’ve met so many grandmas who have small stature,and they look young and fit compared to their big stature counterparts
I thought that I was the only one experiencing the ‘short and slim’ looking like a 12 year old look. Thankfully I’m a little curvy in the right places so I can’t really be mistaken for a boy but I still look like a secondary school student. Worst of all, even the hope that you’ll gain more weight after child birth has been dashed as I still look like my pre-baby self. I even have people asking all the time if I’m the mother of the child. Well I have accepted my fate in silence as I cannot come and… Read more »
I knew it! I knew this gain weight after child birth is not for everyone. So does this mean I might not be lucky??? Don’t break my heart!!!😒😒
Good to have you here Manko, hope you’ll stay tuned for subsequent stories I’ll be posting😃? You can be sure of that by subscribing with the red bell icon by your bottom right.Thank you😊
Story of my life. I feel so pained about it
😪😪😪 me too. Like they preach “God go do am” lol, so fingers crossed. Welcome Blossom 😃
Am happy to join this beautiful conversation
You are welcome Mebra Nellie, Good to have you here. 😃😃
Seeing a cloth you like and can afford buh can’t have it because of your size is the most painful part😭 I wish I could gym tho… Buh lazy ass me won’t be consistent 🤣 and having thick friends with big butts while yours isnt is so shameful too😭
🤣🤣🤣 and you know how the comparison goes 🤣🤣… thankfully my ass weighs more than that of some of my thick friends.
Nice one muttering minds. Thanks for enlightening the readers that body shaming also applies to slim people as well. We all need to take into consideration the sort of comments we make regarding other people physical appearance, no matter how cordial you think you both are.
Key Word: “NO MATTER HOW CORDIAL”. Some close parties do not know where to draw the line 😪
Story of my life. I use 3months of chopping life to gain 2 to 3kg and then 2days stress takes 4 to 5kg. E nor just balance 😥
Do you get!! And sometimes you can notice it the moment you start deflating. You’re seeing it but you can’t help it. Automatically you get angry 😵😵
It’s worse when you are slim and you’ve got tummy pooch. It takes me a month or more to put on small weight and a week or less to loose it all. 😑 I’m usually scared of taking boosters as they say it has its effect.
So here’s one natural thing that has worked for me, I call it UNPROCESSED YOGHURT.
P.S : I’m married 🙂
Finally I get to scream “God When!!!” at a comment 🗣🗣🗣
I have heard that “unprocessed yoghurt” works like magic. I will just have to be patient and wait my turn 🤒🤒
🤣🤣🤣 that tommy pouch is so annoying. I want fat in the right places and my stomach is a wrong turn 🤣🤣🤣
I can totally relate to this. I often get comments like ‘”chai Ruth you don’t Change one bit” or something like “when will you add” 😂😂… I don’t really let them get to me though because I totally accept the way I am and nobody can ever make me feel depressed over it.
Well for me, I am one foot in, one foot out. I like it sometimes but other times I crave some thickness.🙃
Ujuuuu 😫😫😫
You understand this struggle of gaining weight and loosing it in the twinkle of an eye. Someone somewhere will make matters worse and call you “agric chicken”.
Another person will say “you haven’t gained weight since high school”. In my mind, I’m like “mind your business…it’s not my fault”
I absolutely love that I’m small and “down to earth” 😫😫😫 actually fun sized…abeg leave my size alone, I just want to have some butt…dazzol
🤣🤣🤣🤣 Agric whattttt!! I forgive them on your behalf. Sometimes I wish one of these weight watchers can take a trip into my head and see how much I curse them.
You want some butt?? One! Two! Go!… start squatting 🏋️♂️
Squat ko
Better lemme 😂
But does the squat exercise really work?
Well I wont be so fast to say “Yes” even though it worked for me. At some point I realized that different body types respond to it differently. But in my opinion I will say it works 95%.
This is so apt like I can relate I’m not skinny but I can totally relate
😆😆 you don’t know what the Lord has done for you. I’m happy you can relate 😊
It’s my first time here. You have definitely been speaking my mind from the beginning of your post to the end. I wish people were more considerate and realise that body shaming also applies to slim people too. I’ve been called different names that I’ve just gotten used to it. I have no access to a gym but could you please share your workout routines? Thank you.
Welcome Geepht 😀 Thankfully I mirrored your mind. Sorry about the name-calling too 😃. My workout routine was more of squatting. I could squat so much that 500 squats felt like nothing unlike when I just started I could barely do 50. I got used to squatting that I had to start doing deadlifts. They both helped to expand my hip muscles and made my butts fleshy. For my stamina and building my solid rock core, planking was my go-to. Side planking and Russian twist helped with trimming my waist. Initially my waist use to be 27 inches but it… Read more »
So apt! Like me, looking out for every weight gain stimulus (anyways I found one again, lol hoping it comes with the curves it’s promising). Mostly great “regular” food, balanced vitamin, good sleep and occasional workout does the magic to my body. Your butt na your savior sha… always been.
I wont lie, I’m bad at eating regularly, I might just be a big part of my problem😒
As for vitamins, I do take them, especially food supplements. The two noticable difference for me with vitamins is that it makes my skin look fresh and my eyes very active. No weight o 😪
Well…let the butts remain my saviour plsss🤣🤣🤣
I still get those words sometimes of how slim I am, But it doesn’t get to me anymore… Like, wetin concern me😂, except when it comes from someone close and I give them a sharp reply at once. Presently I weigh 56/57, when I’m relaxed I get to 60, but it takes too much work…., U might be wondering how come I’m weighing this and saying I’m slim😅, the truth is my sister I’m tall, like 6ft… So been tall and not thick, u automatically look tiny, the bone mass is y u look like you have so much weight,… Read more »
You weigh 56/57…😵😵😵 I wantttt…
‘Unbalanced pendulum’ got me rolling 🤣🤣🤣. Seems like we both got the ass, only that mine is disappointing sometimes lol.
Well, about the glowing skin…that’s a topic for another day, I feel like I got something to share in that aspect too🙃.
You are new here Vicky! Welcome. It is a pleasure ❣
This is one of my many insecurities am not so skinny but I care soo much about my butt
Seems like every lady is obsessed with getting it big down there 😄.
Welcome Naomi❣
Absolutely love this article. I can relate to everything you mentioned. Slim people are constantly being body shamed, and people act like it’s not a thing and that’s not okay.
Thank you Ola. It is about time the society hears this side of the story.
Also welcome 😁😁… I look forward to more of your contributions.
I’ve never seen anyone describe ass with such perfection and details like you did. Daaaaammmmmnnn!!!!
the truth is that Wether you like it or not, you’ll still gain weight in the nearest future. it’s just natural for women
🤣🤣🤣🤣 now I am shy. Well they said we will get fat, we are waiting. 🤨
C’mon everyone has an ass. No need to be shy. Women gain weight Mostly after childbirth. That’s why I may marry broomstick so that after childbirth she go add weight come dey fresher
🤣🤣🤣🤣 you had to shade us with ‘broomstick’ right???
This is an enlightening read from you Uju. To imagine that I’m also guilty of calling my friends smallie or lepa when I’m also Short and Between slim and skinny but for my little bum and full breasts. I would have to stop that act thanks to you 😊. Plus I can totally relate with the you never changed since secondary school chant by many of my mates but I kinda take it as a compliment. I only get irritated when I’m found amongst girls and they start giving compliments about my body, the shape of my butt, the look… Read more »
Lab rat?🤣🤣🤣… I’m glad you were able to pick something from this post Airstar.
I say a big ‘Amen’ to the add fat in the right places prayer point and cast out any demon of belly fat 🤣🤣🤣. How can my chi refuse me bum fat and give me belly fat? Impossible!
Good to hear from you Airstar😁
Uju say na “birdbrained approach”.🤣 Mann! This is one hell of a read. My dilemma babes. Story of my life. 😪 😥
It was now 🤣🤣🤣…I’m thinking, maybe I should create a community for “slim girls trying to get fat”🤣🤣
I know how it feels to have the slim curse, people are always saying Becka your body is fine, having a big. Ish is depressing but what they don’t understand is that having a small body is just as depressing
Keyword “JUST AS DEPRESSING”. Hopefully in the nearest future, we will be able to boast of some new weight that is as beautiful and won’t leave us😁.
Welcome Becka❣
Maybe you could also post more tips on how to gain weight THAT WILL STAY😂
Soon🤣🤣🤣 and that’s after I have discovered and tested it on myself. Don’t worry, I got you 😁
So many on this table. It’s very depressing. Sickness is always the one to take the little weight away from me. My dad is always on my neck about my body, always making me look as if being slim is a cure. So many appetite drugs but…. mehn it haven’t been easy.
Same as me, if it’s not stress, fever just shows up like ‘tada!’ and rips me off my weight.😵😵
[…] Rare Insecurities: My Ordeal with the Slim Curse […]
This is soooo me. I was fluctuating BTW 49&50kg for years before covid came. I wear a size 4 from the children section because of my size and then my height really small 😅, so I usually look like an 18 year old when I am already in my late 20’s. It’s so annoying when I step out and people I am older than call me ‘girl’ or some colleagues referring to my size. The worst is I loose weight once I get a little stress, I’ve been trying so hard not to overthink certain things because I am scared… Read more »
It feels like you just described my body 😆😆
Somehow I feel Covid came with some bright sides as the much needed weight is now coming to play. I am trying to gain as much so that even though I resume full time hustle, the weight shed wont break my heart 😂😂
Good to hear from you Eziukwu🙂
I weigh 67 kg and it’s lightweight for a guy. It’s a struggle buying clothes cos I constantly reshape them. (Thank God my younger bro is a tailor….so it’s free) I tried drinking milk,but I’m lactose intolerant. Blood tonic, didn’t work too. I feel your pain my dear. We’ll all be fine las las.
I am lactose intolerant too but sometimes I break protocol. Suffering the effect is even worse, I end up stooling excessively and it leads to weight loss😪.
Thank you for assuring me I’ll be fine. Guess what, I have resumed the gym again and I feel better🤭.
Good to have you here Fisayo, maybe I get to feature your story someday. 😅
Thanks a lot. I write short stories too. Hopefully I’ll be courageous someday to publish them….. lol
O great. Let me know whenever 😃
I didn’t know that we all were treated the same way starting from grade 3 my classmates used to measure my hands with their fingers…and they always say do u eat or something like that…some of them will tell their friends from another class and some will come and ask me to show them … I always laughed when they make jokes about my body even though it hurt me inside..now I’m 18 with 47 kg ….what make it worse is I’m 183 cm and it makes me look more thinner (I’m a boy btw) so any one here who… Read more »
Awww Yaecob I’ve got so much hope for you especially judging by your age. You are still young and I believe you’ll add some before you are 25 at least. Maybe click 50kg or way more except there are some health challenges or it’s your nature. Try eating right and exercising and make sure you are not mentally stressed. I noticed mental stress also contributes to weight loss. If you are eating and doing everything right but still not gaining weight, then you should check your mental health. About the derogatory remarks, if you need to tell them how you… Read more »
I used to have this exact struggle!! I am short, I have some nice looking hips but with a little “weird shaped” bum. So when I was slim I only managed to look good from the front sometimes 😭. I couldn’t wear tight trousers Cos I had this very ugly and weird thigh gap. Oh I hated it soooo dang much!! When I would loose weight and people will comment the first place I’ll be worried about is my bum 😩 People called me smallie and some said things like “you have fine hips but your ass is wide and… Read more »
Wow… you captured my attention so much mehn. Especially the part you said “opposite of anorexia”…now I’ll have to do a research on that. I wonder why the health sector focuses only on anorexia, for you to have mentioned your phobia for losing 1kg then there are so many others out there who are extremely concious of their weight. I’m glad you could achieve your dream weight. Well as at the time I wrote this article I was 49kg now I am 53kg. Thanks to the gym, I have started my journey again. I intend to follow a strict diet… Read more »