And if you die, and all that happens is nothingness, how would you feel? My question is pointless because since it’s nothingness, you cannot feel anything. Your body lays in the wait; for a moment you’re still fresh, then you bloat, and thereafter metamorphose into active then advanced decay. How unfair, all you lived for was to end up becoming a bag of bones, six feet under the ground, if care is not taken, your graveside is shown no respect too as it becomes a stop, sit and gist hub for tired buttocks and wagging lips in the neighborhood. How unfair… let’s not even suffer further trauma by telling about those bodies whose fate lies at the mercy of pivotal and sometimes pointless scientific experiments. God forbid I end up a cadaver!
Have you ever wondered what happens when you die? Well, I have many times, sometimes I think of it as a long sleep whereby I’m aware and struggle to wake like a comatose but I can’t and that becomes my eternal punishment. I sometimes see myself wandering in an open green field, waiting for a sunbeam in the skies, and then the voice of the creator chips in to tender a list of my sins and decides if I belong to heaven or hell (movies made this possible for my memory to create)
My Personal Bias for Heaven and Hell
By birth and an average sense of thought, I like to believe that I’m a Christain but for as long as I’ve been familiar with the words heaven and hell, I’m unashamed to say despite all that I’ve read in the religious books, I still find the concept of hell absurd. They say the good guys who believe in Christ will make heaven but the good ones who do not know Christ will go to hell, likewise the bad ones. Hmmmmmm what if I’ve been good all my life but the circumstances surrounding my birth didn’t welcome me to christ? I mean if a person is born of atheist parents whereby they grow up not knowing anything about the church, yet very good at heart, does that mean they’ll make hell?
The world is too hard already, why do some of us have to suffer an afterlife of torment? Weeping? Wailing? Gnashing of teeth? Darkness? Burning? Everlasting punishment? And to say the peak, it’ll be beyond anything humanly imaginable. Why? I didn’t ask to be birthed but here I am, trying my best to make heaven. There are many things in the world I’ve been fashioned to fight for and death which is supposed to give my soul a blissful rest also has a prize attached to it?
Using the most basic example; as a baby, I had to win the race of learning how to walk, then I graduate to nursery school, learning the ropes of ‘how to come first’ in class, this doesn’t stop even in elementary where I still even had to ensure I passed my Common Entrance Examination. And in the secondary journey, there’s still the “come first in class” mentality. Then there is JAMB, and the university too… thereafter job hunting, which metamorphoses into a need to ‘come first in life’, be successful! Let’s not forget amid all these, other areas of life showcase themselves to break and shape me mostly without my will. You mean after all this hassle, I am not guaranteed heaven?
And then the people who commit suicide too, automatically wins an exclusive lounge in hell? A person who commits suicide wanted out of life’s rat race and hoped that their soul can finally rest but you mean to say hell becomes their comfort? Nah! It doesn’t make sense.
My Personal Bias For the Creation Story…
“If God didn’t want evil to exist, why did he create the tree of knowledge of good and evil?” I’ve asked a few of my religiously inclined friends this question severally but no one has been able to provide me with a soothing answer to run with. God knew what evil was, he could have created just a tree with no strings attached but he did this. Is it sage to say he is the origin of every evil existing in the world?
A friend responded to my question saying that God did not want a dictator relationship with man, thus blessing us with free will to choose good or evil. But I still think it’s absurd. Since he sees the end from the beginning, creating a tree for face value would have saved me from this backbreaking heavenly race. Everything on the earth should have been created good and we’ll still live our lives perfectly, after all, what I don’t know wouldn’t harm me. Better still, God would have just left all of us in heaven, singing praises to him.
And then the prince of evil, the incredibly fallen angel…the devil…why does he have the fame of the earth? Couldn’t he have been crushed by God at the very foundation of his rebellion? I know a lot of Christians will defend this with scriptures indicating that the devil got nothing on a person so long as they have given their lives to Jesus, but I’ll still maintain that he shouldn’t have been featured on earth. Why was he not crushed? I mean crushed in the sense that man didn’t have to even know that he once existed at all. Then I’m also tempted to ask, how did the devil know too much to rebel against the almighty? how is it that seed of rebellion grew in his heart? Remember he was among the host of angels there before the tree of knowledge was created.
A Fault in the Book or…
“Okay so, do you believe in the rapture”, my friend Jules asked me the other day at the saloon and my response was “I do not care what the religious books say, my guts don’t believe it, so you mean to tell me a certain time will come and the soldiers for christ will ascend into heaven? Nah!” Jules requested that I read the book of revelation for more insight.
The truth is I’ve done so in time past, but my guts won’t welcome it. There’s a way that my mind works, it works in a way that I trust over religion. My mind is a conscious yet subconscious selective reader of anything and this includes the bible. It reads every part and selects a truth to abide by and the rest that look like too much, it doesn’t let it take root. For a fact, I do not believe the world will ever come to an end, I believe birth and death will always occur and if there exist judgment, every man shall face theirs as soon as they die. I find it rather humorous that there will be an ascension of the so-called righteous ones and then the beast and his league torments the rest on earth. The whole concept of rapture makes me believe there’s a fault somewhere in the documentation of the bible, perhaps some group found it a worthy opportunity to test their imaginary skills.
Likewise the questions I asked about the creation story, I feel it strongly in my guts that there’s a misrepresentation somewhere. A whole lot amiss and as a freethinker, I cannot help but poke.
Believe and Death…
I know you have one too many questions on your mind as you’re reading this and I presume the most dominant is “Does this writer believe in God?” Yes I do, I’ve felt him in too many to count instances in my life to not believe him. The most recent is praying to him to heal my dog who suffered a hematoma on her left ears. I couldn’t afford the vet bills and it pained me to see her groan in pain daily. She lost all the butterflies in her stomach, refused meals even her best meals, and grew weaker each day. I felt helpless, all I could do was pray to God and in about a few weeks, the hematoma burst open, thus relieving her of the pain. She’s better now.
I know some vets reading this will say “ooooh well, that was bound to happen”…Hell yeah! That was God coming through for me. I enjoy my personal relationship with God, I believe in him too much, he lives in my mind and the love we share is not necessarily based on what the religious books say or what the man on the pulpit tells me to believe about him.
And then I think of death again…there used to be a time that I usually reasoned that it is unfair that I’ll one day have to die especially comparing myself to Methusela who lived 969 years on earth. Most of the unfairness I felt dwelt on the fact that I wouldn’t even live up to half his age on the earth. And one time, a question struck my mind “What will you be doing for that long on the earth? Are you not tired of the unending rat race already?” It dawned on me that death is the ultimate peaceful solution. Can you now see why the concept of hell irks me so bad? If truly there is a hell after, then the best option for me will be nothingness after death. I’ll prefer to be a bag of bones six feet under with no memory of the world or me than to land a place in hell. It’s either heaven or nothingness for me. But again, no one knows what happens when we die. I do not care what the religious book says, we haven’t heard live scores from anyone who died before concerning what it’s like. So until we die, fingers crossed.
I know when any topic on death or especially religion comes up, people see it as an avenue to argue tooth and nail. No! That’s not my aim for this story, I felt the need to voice these off my mind as it’s been burning for a long time now. On this note, I’ll like to ask you, do our minds correspond in any way? Or contradict as regards all I said? It will be a privilege to also hear your personal high held opinions concerning death, the afterlife, heaven and hell, and other celestial reservations you might have. Like I said, no arguments, just tell me how it really feels in the deepest below of your mind. Leave me a comment, please😶👇.
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